Where We Belong
by Megan Faye
Summary: Part three in Give A Little Bit Series. Please read Give a Little Bit and Stones in the Road. This is the continuing story of our gang through the years.
1. Chapter 1

Title: We Belong

Rate: PG

Author: Megan Faye

* * *

The wind whipped through her long curly hair as she weeved through the crowd of people up to the 1-6. The young woman glanced down at the new sports watch Olivia Stabler had given her as a graduation gift.

"Right on time!" She locked her bike and jogged up the stairs.

Her father would be upset if she were late, but it was summer, and her new bike was too tempting to pass up. It was a gift that John gave his daughter when she graduated high school a week earlier. She'd only been in school for the last 6 years, but Hannah Munch was hard-working, and very intellegent. She was so far behind when she started school at 9, but she caught up so quickly with the tutoring sessions John set up for her. When she was 10, she started acting in a children's theater over the summer. It pushed her reading skills through the roof, and the other kids were very helpful. The children's theater was through a school that Hannah switched to after a year at the private school close to the 1-6. The classes were much smaller, the teachers seemed nicer, and Hannah was surrounded by friends her own age for the first time in her life.

Now, at nearly 16, she was a very different person than the child John adopted. Hannah was sophisticated, and very beautiful, but her sense of humor was what attracted the world to her. She was sweet and kind. The plaid skirts and braids were a thing of the past. She gave those up at 11 when Casey, Alex, and Liv took her wall climbing. They got to Ascend, and Hannah couldn't climb in a skirt, so Alex bought her shorts, a T Shirt, and a pair of Nikes. John had a fit. His little daughter in shorts? She wasn't being raised as a tom-boy!

Hannah stood nose to nose with John and told him that a pair of shorts wasn't going to kill either of them, and he could get over it.

Now, her wardrobe consisted of "Normal People" clothes, as Hannah put it. John dealt with the change in his own way. By the end of the summer, Hannah wore nothing but khaki shorts and t shirts. And to everyone's surprise, John eventually bought her sandels from REI so she could go white-water rafting with Alex, Maureen, Lizzie and Olivia.

"Hi Papa," she called, bringing her bike helmat into the squad room. She stood on her tip-toes and kissed his cheek, pony-tail bobbing. "Alex is in court for another half-hour, right?" John nodded and sniffed the air.

"Is that coming from you?"

"Its over 90 degrees, Pops. I rode in on the bike."

"_The_ bike? _The_ bike. You hear this? Last 6 months I hear that its not just a bike, its a mode of transportation better than a cab, 18 speed, auto gear shift, shocks, and extra soft seat. Now its "_The_" bike." Hannah laughed lightly.

"And its the smoothest ride I've ever felt. It took me half an hour to get from out place up here. Its a truely sweet bicycle. And, yes, Papa, it is locked up."

"Go get cleaned up, oh child of mine."

"I'll be back down in 10," the teenager chirped as she bounced up the stairs.

"When did she become perky?" Elliot asked, stepping out of his office. He sipped the coffee and watched the young woman jogg toward the cribs.

"Somewhere between 12 and 15." John sighed heavily.

"You okay?"

"She grew up too fast, Elliot."

"Yeah," he laughed. "Tell me about it. Maureen's almost 30. Haven't heard from her since the wedding." Elliot sipped at the coffee again and looked at his office door. Even though his name was on the door for the last 6 years, he still expected to see Don through the glass. "Speaking of kids, at least half of mine should be here soon for our little lunch thing."

"Which ones?"

"Liz is bringing the little ones by. Dickie might be joining them."

"They are 6 and 8. Hardly little." Elliot frowned.

"I miss them being babies."

"I miss Hannah being a kid, too. Just sort of flew by," Fin added from his desk. "She's still pretty cool, Munch."

"So," Elliot said calling attention from his squad. "Its quiet here today."

"Always a good thing."

"Liv's picking up Casey and Alex and meeting us out front. Is Hannah enjoying working with Alex and Casey?" John shrugged.

"She's taking a year off to get some work in. I told her that she could go to college, but she'd be the youngest one there. Didn't thrill her too much." Elliot snorted.

"Yeah, that's your kid." Elliot heard his fax machine buzzing and he went back into his office. Moments later, he stepped out. "Who's catching?"

"Me," a voice called on her way in the door."

"Maureen-"

"You didn't read the transfer files, did you, Captain?" Elliot groaned and handed his daughter the papers.

"After everything I did to keep you kids away from this, you come after it?"

"Just give me the damn file, Stabler."

"Yes, Ma'am," he answered his daughter. She scanned the file and looked up. "Go -"

"Dad, its Layla," Maureen said, looking up at her father. Elliot met his daughter's eyes for an instant before grabbing his coat.

* * *

Maureen had seen her father drive like a maniac twice in her life. Her mother was in labor both times. Now, Maureen's childhood friend was in the hospital, and she was landed with the case. Elliot warned her that becoming a cop would bring her in contact with friends, and investigating crimes commited by her friends or against her friends. She knew the idea that people she knew would be hurt, but the reality hadn't touched her yet. Layla grew up next door to the Stabler's, and was only a few months younger than Kathleen. Now she was sitting in a hospital bed, violated by some disgusting excuse of a human being, probably just wanting some friendly face to tell her she's going to be all right. 

"Your new partner should be in next week. Just cleaned out my old desk for you. I had no I dea it was you coming, Maur."

"Who's my partner?"

"His name is James McHale. Ryan and McHale. Sounds like a good pairing."

"Stabler. I'm not taking Luke's last name." Elliot furrowed his brow and glanced at his daughter. "Stabler is a strong name that means something in the NYPD. There's you and Olivia; two very decorated officers, both Captains, both with high collar rates, and my god, the commendations you two have. Major Cases wanted me, but I wanted SVU. Carry on the family name."

"You sond like me 20-some-odd years ago. I'm sorry your first case is going to be a tough one."

"If I wanted easy, I'd have gone into Computer Crimes."

"Hey, don't knock Olivia's job-"

"I'm not, but I wouldn't call her work as emotionally draining as yours. Its fraud, ID theft, hackers," she said.

"And internet kiddie shows, video of my cases being sold online-"

"I get it, Stabler."

"You know, when we're not in the actual squadroom, you _can_ call me Dad."

"Not on the job I can't. Its important to me to be impartial to all involved." Elliot shrugged, nodded and pulled into the hospital parking lot.

* * *

Allie flipped through the paper-work. Hannah had started on her work that she brought over while she babysat, Eli was asleep, and she was supposed to be asleep. But, being a Stabler, she wanted to know things. Specifically, she wanted to see her birth certificate. She'd see Eli's, Maureen's and Lizzie and Dickie's. Allison assumed that Kathleen had hers in Seattle. But, Allie had never seen hers.

After a few minutes of digging, she came across a file labeled Benson, Serena.

"That's Grandma," she whispered, and filed past it. A few files back in her mother's well-organized filing cabinet, she found "Medical Redcords," and everyone had a file. "Mom," she said, flipping. "Dad, Maureen, Katie, Liz, Dickie, here we go," she muttered pulling out her file. "Allison Paige Benson."

Allie sat back in shock. She wasn't a Stabler at birth. Allie Benson; born to Olivia Dawn Benson and James Wilson. The next slip of paper was her adoption paperwork. Tears slipped down her cheeks as she read that her father signed her away to Olivia when she was just an infant, and that Elliot waited until she was over a year old to adopt her. She knew her mom would be angry if she caught her digging through the files, but at this point, she didn't care. Allie read every thing she could understand.

"Allie?" Olivia called, looking in the closet. When she saw the file her daughter held, she stared silently at the crying child.

"Why didn't you tell me?" she asked softly. "Who is James, Mom?"

"He's a doctor in New Jersey that I dadted for a while."

"Why didn't he want me?"

"Sweetie, he's gay. Do you remember that conversation we had about why Kathleen and Rose are basically married? James lives with a man, and didn't want to have children yet. But through out my pregnancy with you, Elliot was there for me. He held you the day you were born, brought you out to Grandpa Don, and he's loved you since before you were born."

"Then why'd he wait so long to adopt me?"

"These things take time, Honey." Allie looked up at her, tears streaming down her cheeks. "Allison, some things in life, we can't control. Elliot Stabler has been the only father you've ever known, and I want you to remember that while you process this. Okay, sweetie?" Allie nodded. "So, come out of my closet and go lay on my bed. You can sleep with us tonight if you need." Allie nodded and crawled into her mother's spot on the bed. Elliot stepped into the bedroom and started to hang his coat in the closet.

"Olivia? We got a Monkey infestation-" Olivia shook her head and Elliot threw her a questioning look. "Rough day?"

"She knows about James." Elliot's heart fell through his chest. He toed his shoes off and laid on the bed next to the young girl. Olivia decided to give them privacy to talk.

"Allie?" he called gently. The child poked her head from between pillows and blankets. "Do we need Starbucks or can we talk here?" She was quiet a moment.

"Here's good." Elliot squirmed into the bed next to his daughter and draped his hand on her back.

"Are you okay, Allison?"

"I guess," she said weakly. "Are you sure about James being my-" she stopped.

"Yes, honey. We're absolutely sure that he is your biological father. He's a very smart, very nice doctor in New Jersey." Allie nodded and took in the information. She looked up at him, eyes pooling with tears. "He loved you very much and wanted the best for you."

"Can...can I...?"

"Meet him?" She shook her head fiercely. "What, sweetie?"

"Can I still call you Daddy?" she choked out. Elliot pulled his daughter to his chest.

"Allison Paige Stabler, I will always be your Dad," he whispered into her hair. "I love you, and have loved you from the minute your mother told be you were going to be born. Okay, sweetie?" Her head bobbed lightly. "Go get dressed, Princess."

"Why?"

"You and me are headed to talk over a hot chocokate, and the best place on Earth for hot chocolate is Starbucks." Allie climbed out of her parents' bed and wandered off toward her room. Moments later, Olivia appeared in the doorway. "We're going to have a hot chocolate on the corner."

"She okay?"

"Its a lot for her to proccess."

"Are you okay?" Elliot nodded and pulled his wife the rest of the way into the room and hugged her tightly, burying his head in her stomach. She stood over him where he sat on the edge of the bed. "We knew she'd find out eventually-"

"I was planning on telling her when she was a little older," came a muffled response from her middle. "Like 30." Olivia pulled back and tilted his chin to face her. "Liv, she asked if I could still be her Daddy."

"Its a good sign, Love." Elliot shrugged and started to pull his shoes on. "Take a few days off with her and spend some time with her." Elliot nodded when he saw Allie through the door pulling her shoes on. "She needs you right now."

* * *

Chapter 2 is almost ready to post! Sorry its taken me so long to get back to fanfic...we were in the middle of a move. 


	2. Chapter 2

Where We Belong

Chapter 2

A/N: I hope I can live up to the standards set after the success of Give a Little Bit and Stones In the Road. This one isn't coming as easily, but its still coming along :) I hope you all enjoy it. I'm enjoying writing it. Its (hopefully) going to be longer than the first two. If not, I'll have to write a fourth :-)

* * *

Maureen stepped into the shower to wash away the horrible day she'd had. The man who attacked her friend got off, thanks to supression of DNA evidence. Her father tried to tell her that things like that happen all the time. He'll eventually get caught again, and now his DNA was in the system. It would be easier the second time around. That wasn't good enough for Maureen. Her first case in the unit, working for her father, and she screwed the case up. Maureen climbed out of the shower and fell to her knees in front of the toilet. She scrambled with the lid, and threw up the second it was open.

"Maureen? Honey? You okay?" Luke called from the bedroom. She retched again and he was by her side. "Rough day, Maur?" She nodded and dry heaved once more before trying to stand. Luke steadied her, and brought her to the sink. As she splashed water into her mouth, she heard the shower cut off.

"The bastard got off." Luke sighed and rubbed her back.

"Honey, it'll get better. It has to."

"I know, but she was one of my best friends as a kid. Now she's afraid of leaving her house."

"It is_ not_ your fault, Maureen Rebecca Stabler." She pulled away from him and shrugged her robe on. As she stormed into the bedroom. "Don't be like this, honey."

"Luke, I need space." Luke whirled her to face him and spoke gently.

"Do not push me away. We're more than that, we're a better and stronger couple than your dad and Kathy. You don't have to hide your work from me; I've seen it, and I can handle it." Maureen sighed and allowed her new husband to hug her close. A moment into the hug and she sobbed openly. "You did everything you could, Maureen. She knows that. I know that, and your father knows that."

"Luke, I," she took a deep breath. "I screwed up, Casey and Alex couldn't fix it. Because I tried to get things done quickly, I lost the case."

"Is his DNA in the system?"

"It is now..."

"Then you'll catch him next time. Filth like that rarely strike once." Luke handed her a pair of sweats and started digging for socks. "We're going for a walk."

"But-"

"You'll feel better after you walk this off, have some hot chocolate, and make fun of strangers."

"Well...when you put it that way..." Maureen stepped back into the bathroom to dry off and dress.

* * *

Allie, being a curious and intellegent 8 year old, looked back from her dad to her mom. One was bound to yell. She hoped it was Elliot. Allison knew that while he yelled louder, it was over when he stopped. Her mother, on the other hand, would hold a grudge. The dissapointment would linger for days.

"Allison Paige Stabler," Olivia started. 'Damn,' Allie thought to herself. "I understand you are curious about James, but you may not hack my computer!" Liv yelled. She had never yelled at Allie before. Allison knew she was in over her head.

"I didn't hack it..."

"You found a neighbor's wireless network, broke into it, used it to detect mine, broke into that, and surfed my desktop through your computer."

"I can't Google from mine."

"THERE IS A REASON FOR THAT!" Elliot hollered, starting to stand. Liv touched his arm and he fell back into his seat. "You aren't allowed to use the web without one of us there for a reason, Allison Stabler."

"I KNOW, creepy, nasty pedophiles...I Get it, Dad. But looking for a Jewish doctor in Jersey...not many creeps there." Olivia rubbed her forehead. "I just wanna know about him. Do I look like him? Sound like him?"Elliot stood and walked out of the apartment, shutting the door too gently behind him for Liv's comfort. She closed her eyes to keep the tears at bay.

"You have his eyes," Olivia said softly. "And his smile." Allie snuggled onto her mother's lap.

"Mom, I'm sorry I hacked your computer."

"I know."

"Dad's mad at me, isn't he."

"No, sweet heart. He's mad at James for not loving you," Olivia said, trying to comfort her daughter. "He doesn't know how to respond when you ask questions about James. Why don't you go get ready for bed? I'm going to try and call your dad."

"Mom?"

"Yes, honey?"

"I don't want to meet James. I just want to know about him."

"I know, Allie."

* * *

"Daddy!" the 4-year-old boy squealed, pouncing into his father's arms. "I went potty!"

"Good job, Ronny. Now, where is that train?" Don said poking around under his son's train table.

"So this is what you two do all day? Toilet talk and train sets?" Casey said, standing in the doorway to the play room. Don stood and greeted his wife with a kiss on the cheek.

"Missed you today," he whispered.

"Oh, we could have used you. Maureen...is so green." Don sighed, understanding what she meant. "The whole case is flushed."

"I'm sorry."

"Momma! Lookit what me an' Daddy built!" Casey knelt by her son's train table and looked the tracks over.

"Wow, Red, that looks awsome!" Ronny put the battery operated train on the track and turned it on. "Testing to make sure it won't derail?"

"But it's s'possed to! Big crash, Momma! Real loud!" And sure enough, the train went off the track, into stacked blocks, sending Ronny and Don into laughter. "See? Big crash!"

"That was a big crash!" Casey picked up her son and snuggled him tightly. "Ronald, are you ready for dinner?"

"Yep."

"Okay. Daddy and I will be in the kitchen. Okay?"

"Kay." Don and Casey stepped into the kitchen and greeted a little more lovingly.

"Missed you, too," Casey said, as Don kissed her neck. "We need to feed the red-head. I'm taking tomorrow off. Miss my kid and my husband."

"Wonderful," Don said nudging her gently. He stepped behind her and wrapped his arms around her tightly. "So, I have a lasagna with your name on it."

"Perfect."

"Casey," Don said gently. "When are you going back to church?"

"You don't go, so I don't."

"You're Mormon. I told you I'm willing to convert." Case slammed the dishes onto the counter.

"Not this again. Dammit Don, I don't need this!" She stared at him, eyes flashing an angry green. "I told you, I gave up on God."

"I don't want Ronny to hear that."

"God gave up on me, I gave up on Him," she whispered angrily. "He _let _me loose the baby. He _allowed_ me to be attacked when I was 5 months pregnant and with a 3-year-old at home. Where was He when I was stabbed by a 16 year old kid? Where was He when I was bleeding on the subway while people just stood there? Where the HELL was He when I walked 6 blocks, in premature labor before I passed out in a coffee shop from blood loss?" Casey crossed her arms, and set her jaw to force tears back.

"You know where He was?" Don asked, his voice dangerously low. "He was answering my prayers to save my wife."

"Well, He managed that."

"Not yet He hasn't." Don walked into the next room, picked up Ronny and left the house.

* * *

Elliot slid into the same old booth at the diner that he usually ate at when he and Olivia were at odds. Don went there, Luke went there, John went there. It wasn't much of a surprise to Elliot when Don and Ronny came in. Ronny was in his feety dinosaur pajamas, and asleep in Don's arms. The look of relief came over Don's face when he and Elliot's eyes met. Elliot waved the older man over.

"Casey?"

"Yeah. Liv?"

"No. Allie." Don looked at him curiously. "She found out about James recently and is asking all kinds of questions." Don nodded and put his sleeping son on the bench next to him and covered him with the blanket that never left the boy's sight. Ronny lifted his head once, and put it back down on his Dad's lap. "That kid can sleep through anything."

"Yeah," Don said smiling down at his little boy. "Casey's having a rough time."

"Maureen didn't lose the case today. Casey did. Casey gave up too quickly, and didn't ask Alex to step in quickly enough."

"She shouldn't be back at work yet."

"Don, its been a year. She's been fine the last 6 months, just now, its like she's given up."

"She left the church."

"I didn't know she went to church of any kind."

"Were you at our wedding? It was a very Mormon wedding. Her bishop was there, many Mormons were there, and even a few Missionaries." Elliot shrugged.

"All I know is Catholic; which Liv isn't." The waitress stood over the table with two steaming mugs.

"Thanks Gina," Don said as she placed the coffee in front of the men.

"Anything to eat today, guys?" she asked, smiling sympathetically.

"Triple Bacon cheese burger, extra chilli cheese fries, and a shake."

"Jesus, Elliot! Why not just shove the fat into your arteries!" Don said after the man ordered the greasey foods.

"And you'll have the same?" Gina asked knowingly.

"Please."

"I'll be back in 10." Elliot sipped at the watre he'd been given when he first sat.

"So," he said softly. "Casey just up and left the Church?"

"Won't go, won't take Ronny in, and she's not even saying prayers with him any more," Don said, at a loss. " I'm not part of the church; never have been. But, Elliot, part of Casey is that she's religeous without being offensive. The most beautiful things I've ever heard her say were when she was telling me about her beliefs. It was so solid. Like she was a warrior. She was passionate about it; like she is with work. But now, I can't...She gave up." Elliot nodded silently. "Did you ever give up on your faith?"

"Once."

"When?"

"Kathy left me. I thought God was punishing me. It took me years to realize it was my fault. But by then, Liv and I were together and Alijah was on the way."

"It took you that long to go back to church?"

"I still haven't gone back."

"Elliot, she was raised in a Mormon house-hold. I may not be LDS, but I want that for my only son. I want him to know that love, those values, and that family structure that I didn't have. I can't do that without her." Ronnie turned in his sleep, and popped his thumb in his mouth. The two sat quiet for a few minutes before Don spoke. "What do you think would happen if Olivia suddenly changed? If she decided that she wanted nothing to do with being a cop? What would that be like?"

"Jesus, I can't see Liv as anything but a cop...I mean out side of my wife and the mother of two-thirds of my children."

"Its a big part of her."

"Yeah."

"Take the cop out of Olivia, and what would you have?"

"Half a person."

"That's what is waiting when I get home with him. Half my wife."

* * *

Hope you liked Chapter 2! I'm half way done with Three :) 


	3. Chapter 3

Here's chapter 3! Thanks for the wonderful reveiws! It keeps me going through the hard blocks when I can't find a muse.

* * *

Casey paced nervously with her arms crossed. She sat stiffly in the chair, unconciously rubbing her thumb over the scar given to her by a child who wanted her purse. She hated Tuesdays. Casey wanted to be in court, or with her family. Not in a shrink's office. Don had insisted, and so she went. But she didn't have to talk.

"Casey, your husband said you gave up on God."

"I don't have to believe in God. Its my right to chose what I believe."

"Yes, but to suddenly lose faith must have had an impact on you as a prosecutor, wife and mother." Casey rolled her eyes. "Has your work suffered since you left church?" Now she scoffed.

"The case was flushed because a newbie detective, who wanted to play 'Cops and Robbers' like her dad, the Captain, doesn't know how to do her damn job!" Casey fumed. "Maureen went against pro-"

"That's not true, Casey," Don said. "You needed help, and you didn't ask for it-"

"Really," she said. "And you know this because you were there?" Don snapped his mouth closed. "Well, Don? Were you there?"

"No."

"Then shut the hell up. You weren't at the hearing. The judge decided unfairly, and Maureen screwed up with evidence."

"And you've won cases with much less. You gave up."

"Fuck you!" Don sat back. He'd never heard his wife swear, other than the occasional 'ass' here, and 'damn' there. Nothing this strong.

"Casey-"

"He tried to fucking kill me, while you were playing with a FUCKING TRAIN SET! You should have been there!" she screamed. "If you had been keeping track of the time, you and Ronnie would have been waiting when I got off work like we planned! If you had picked me up, I wouldn't have been on the subway. We'd still have Kale." Her voice was low and dangerous. "You forgot about me, and our baby died. You killed our son." Don stared at her the whole time she spoke, frozen in guilt and shock.

"Casey, that's not fair," the psychiatrist said. Don stood to leave. "Captain-"

"Save it. She's right." He pulled his wallet out, and threw a wad of cash down. "I need to pick up Ronny from Liv and Elliot's."

"Don, wait-"

"No." Don looked back at her once more. "I love you, and I hope you will remember that."

* * *

Hannah stared in the mirror and brushed at her wet hair until it was straight enough to braid. If she left it down, it would be annoying her in half an hour. a braid down the back would work for the day of hotdogs in the park with her parents. The soft knock on the door alerted her that her father and Alex were awake and probably wanted to speak with her.

"Come in, I'm decent."

"Hey, sweetie," Alex said sitting on the bed. Hannah smiled back through the mirror.

"Breakfast ready? Or are you here to see if I'll cook."

"No, your Papa's making something. Hannah, we need to talk," she started.

"Uh-oh."

"What?"

"I just know that nothing good ever follows that sentence. Its never 'We need to talk, you just won a million dollars. So spill. What's wrong?" Alex smiled at the young woman who was more like her than she cared to think about.

"Casey and Don are having some problems. We don't know where Casey is."

"She took off?"

"Yeah."

"She'll be back, Ma. Don't freak too badly." Hannah continued to fix her hair.

"She emptied her account, and took all of her clothes."

"Did she take Ronnie?"

"Well, no. Don's in the guest room with him, sleeping."

"She'll be back. Can you finish this for me?" Alex stood behind the short teenager and finished the braid. "She's got some money, but she'll run out, and need to find work. Contrary to TV, she'll need to give a Social security number, and eventually open a bank account. Just have Uncle Elliot put a flag on her number, and she'll turn up eventually."

"Where did you learn that?"

"Gee, Papa's a cop, you're an ADA. Some of that actually stuck. Come on...must have coffee."

* * *

Don listened to Hannah from where he had tried to sleep the night before, Ronny curled up to him soundly. Hannah was right. All they needed to do was flag her as a missing person, and she'd eventually turn up. Don didn't want his wife to 'turn up.' He wanted her to come home. 

"Hi Daddy," came a voice, still half-asleep. "Where Momma?"

"She went on a trip, son."

"I'm hungry." Don knew that Ronnie could sleep through anything, but when he did wake up, he was up for the day.

"Uncle Munchie is making breakfast. Why don't you go potty and I'll get dressed?" The boy leapt off the bead, running the second his little feet his the floor. Don pulled on his jeans and changed into a clean t-shirt. The gratitude he had for John Munch was endless at this point. He'd shown up at 11:30 at night with Ronnie, after realizing that Casey wasn't just out to cool off. Elliot and Olivia had a bigger place, but every bed was taken; Elliot and Olivia, Lizzie, Dickie, Allie and Elijah. The twins were home for the summer, and Don didn't want to intrude. John and Alex lived in a 3 bedroom now with Hannah. Don was pulling his socks on when he felt the bed shaking. "Hey, Red. Knock it off. Not your bed."

"Kay Daddy," the boy said landing on his father's back. Don snatched him off the bed and hugged him tightly. "Love you Daddy," Ronnie said.

"I love you, too, Red. Let's eat." The boy stood up on the bed in his baggy flannel feety pajamas. Casey had just bought them, and they were too big, but they were already the boy's favorite. Ronny didn't see Casey very often; she worked a lot. He'd be aslep when she got home from work, and asleep when she left most days. The last year, she'd almost ignored Ronniy completely, aside from 5 minutes after work, if Don had kept him up late. Casey hardly knew her son, and it broke Don's heart. Since the attack, she'd changed so much. She was bitter and angry, and careless at work.

Casey wasn't the woman he'd fallen in-love with and married.

She was changed by this; so was Don, but not nearly as much. Don retreated into focussing on Ronny to the point of spoiling him, and Casey couldn't look at either of them.

"Daddy?"

"What?"

"Is Momma coming back?" Don just picked up his son and walked into the kitchen. It was full of noise, and the question would be forgotten.

"Hey, Red!" Hannah said, roughing the boy's red hair. "Want some pancakes?"

"Are they chocolate chip?" Alex asked as she dug for the Soy milk.

"Comfort food always has chocolate, darling," John said over his shoulder. "We could all use a little comfort food. Hannah picked up some Soy milk for Ronny."

"Thanks." John put a short stack in front of Ronny, and one in front of Don. "Any word?"

"No," John said softly. "Elliot's got people on it."

"Good."

* * *

_Castle Rock, CO_

Casey stepped out of the car car and looked the house over. It had been more than 14 years since she'd been home. The house had changed so much; the flower garden held bushes instead of tulips, and it wasn't blue any more. Her parents had painted it yellow with blue trim.

"Hi, Mom," she said to the woman watering ferns on the porch. The woman stepped down from the stool and carefully down the stairs to meet her daughter.

"When did you get in?"

"A couple of hours ago...Mom, I had a long flight, and I'd like to just lie down-"

"Casey, you don't have a room here just now; the beds not set up. Its been my craft room since you got married. Where is Don and Ronald?" Casey's eyes welled up and she dropped onto the porch swing.

"I left." the woman put her arms around her daughter. "If Don calls, I'm not here, and you haven't seen me. All right? And make sure Dad understands that."

"Well, all right. If you need to hide out for a few days-"

"Thanks mom." The old woman hugged her daughter tightly. "I just need some time where I can be alone, and just be Casey."

"You know, we still have the horses at Uncle Brigham's farm. Your brothers and sisters haven't seen you in, Lord, 5 years? Why don't you go rest up stairs, and I'll call the family over."

"Mom, they'll want to meet Ronny, and I don't want to have to explain-"

"Nonsense, Casadee. You'll have dinner with them tonight, and they'll behave themselves. Just your brothers and sister; they' leave the families behind. Okay?" Casey nodded. "Its been so long since I had all my birds in the nest. Very loud house when you were little; youngest of 6."

"I know," Casey said, looking toward the empty yard that was once full of bikes and toys through the summer, and sleds through the winter. "Mom, can I lie down a while now?" The old woman nodded and watched her daughter walk into the house.

"Carol Lynn?" a man called as he rounded the side of the house. "Who's here, sweet heart?"

"Casadee."

"Last time you called her Casadee, she was talking about moving to New York. What is she into this time?"

"Fight with Don I think. She left him and Ronny in New York and would like to hide out here a while. You'll keep it quiet, right Caleb?"

"If she wants to hide here, I'll keep it quiet." Caleb sat down next to his wife on the porch swing. "How is she?"

"Broken," Carol Lynn said, sadly. "My baby girl is broken."

* * *

The living room was dark when Ronny woke up from his nap. He tiptoed in to his father's lay-z-boy chair and stared at the old man who sat staring up at the clock. Don hadn't noticed his son, and Ron hadn't made a noise. Ronny studied the man before him, trying to figure out what was going on. 

"Daddy?" Ronny called softly. "What's wrong?" Don looked away from the clock and into the green eyes in front of him. Ronny had Casey's eyes, that's for sure.

"I miss your mother."

"I miss Momma, too." Don pulled his son into his lap and rocked him gently.

"Ron, your mother's been gone about a week now. I thought she would be home by now."

"Is she coming home?" Don swallowed roughly.

"I don't know, Son. She might not."

"But I want her to, Daddy! Call her!" Don hugged the boy who had started crying.

"I want her home, too, Ron, but she didn't bring her cell phone, and I don't know where she is. She left us."

"Mommy's mad at us?" he said, voice tiny and scared.

"No, she mad at me, and at herself. You are such a good boy; no way she's mad at you." Ronny sniffled and rested on his father's shoulder. Ron had never cried like this, and it broke Don's heart to have his son so hurt by this. Don wanted a stable family for his son, and he wanted it with Casey. She loved him. It had taken a long time for him to accept that she loved him and it was more than a fling for her. When they got married, it was the happiest moment in his life, until the day Ron was born. "Red, it might take a while, but we're going to find you mom, and try bring her home. Okay?"

"Promise?"

"I can't promise she'll come, but I promise we'll try," Don said, looking into his son's big green eyes. "We're going to call Olivia and see what she knows, okay?" Ronny nodded, head still resting on his dad's shoulder. Don reached over and picked up the phone on the table next to his chair. He dialed the familier number and waited.

"_Stabler_," came the voice of his "daughter."

"Liv, its me."

"_Hey, I was about to call you_."

"Tell me she called." Don rubbed hi forhead as Ronny wigled off his daddy's lap and sat down at a pile of legos that had built up over the week.

"_No, but I think I know where she is_."

"Enlighten me."

"_She used her credit card and ID to buy a plane ticket to Utah, and rented a car there, in Salt lake_."

"And?"

"_Its a 6 hour drive to Castle Rock_."

"Olivia, Thank you. Ronny and I'll be on a plane tonight-"

"_Don, wait_."

"What?"

"_I'm already boarding. The last thing she needs is an angry husband knocking on her parents door. She's my best friend, and my step-mother. I'll talk to her, and see what I can do_." Don thought it over in his head. Liv was right. Casey wouldn't listen to him right now. She would listen to the calm words of her friend, who would probably hancuff her to the porch railing if needed until Casey listened. He sighed heavily. Don wanted to go back in time and fix things for his family. "Dad, I'll bring her home."

"Don't make promises you can't keep, Olivia."

"_I'm not. I'll bring her home_."

"Thanks...thank you, Olivia." Don coughed away from the phone to steady his voice.

"_I'll call you from Denver_."

* * *

Hannah read through the book that Alex had left on the table next to a case she was working on. Hannah enjoyed researching for her mom. She enjoyed the quiet of the house when she was reading. John made sure the TV was off, and would occasionally silence the phone. She twirled her hair as she read. 

"Hannah-banana?"

"Hey, Papa."

"Hannah, our show is about to start."

"Can you record it? I'm close. I feel it. This guy is guilty, and I can get his DNA back in. There's a loophole, and I just need to find it-" she was cut off by John shutting the book. "Hey!"

"Hannah, I know you enjoy helping in these cases, but you need to be able to take a break. You've been at the table for 7 hours. Your eyes are blood-shot, you haven't eaten at all today, and its not your case."

"Fine. I'll eat dinner, and then I'm going back to the books." John sighed and sat down across from her. "Papa, while I'm having fun in theater, I have no passion for it. When I find something that Ma missed, and get something like DNA evidence pulled back in...when I save the case, and get the guilty verdict, its a high I've never felt in acting."

"And when you don't?"

"I drink a cup of coffee and go onto the next case."

"You were only supposed to be filing paperwork for Alex and Casey because you to pay for your classes at the theater this fall."

"I still want to go; believe me, I want to go. But as it turns out, I'm as good a lawyer as Casey. Papa, if I study hard over the next year or two, I could get into Harvard. I graduated with a 4.0 GPA, 3 years early, after only going to 5 years. I'm smart enough, and I know I can do it." John smiled at his daughter. "What?"

"Last time I saw that determined look, it was because you wanted to graduate top of your class at 15. I have no doubt in my mind that you can do it. Just...relax a little, eh?" Hannah smiled and nodded.

"Ten more minutes, and I'll even leave the house to eat...hot dogs on the corner, all summer long!"

"Yeah, so it takes less time, and you don't have to do dishes before hitting the books again." Hannah laughed and shrugged. "All right. Who am I to argue with my favorite daughter."

* * *

"Casadee?" 

"Mom, I haven't gone by that since I was 6."

"Its still your name."

"Actually, I changed it when I started law school. Its just Casey now." Carol Lynn sighed and gave her daughter a look that mirrored Casey's 'I dare you to keep pushing it,' look.

"Well, nameless child, there's someone here for you."

"Who? Who'd you tell I was here?"

"I told no one but your brothers and sisters. But there's a woman here who said she's here to see you, and she doesn't look too happy to be in here." Casey climbed out of her old bed and weaved through the crafts that had been carefully moved to make room in the bedroom for Casey.

"You raised 6 kids here, and you don't have ne bedroom left for guests?"

"Casadee-" Casey shot her a look. "Casey, we'll have your brothers' old room finished tomorrow and you can sleep there. If you'd told me you were coming in, I wouldn't have started redecorating. Next time you come out, it'll be a nice guest room, your highness." Casey stopped while passing her mother, and sighed.

"I'm sorry, Mom." She kissed her mother's cheek and trotted down the stairs. When she rounded the corner into the living room, Liv stood and met her, nose to nose. "Liv!"

"Don't 'Liv' me, Casey Cragen."

"Casey, who is this?"

"My step-daughter, Olivia. You met her at the wedding." Carol Lynn looked from one woman to the other and back before she smiled.

"Good luck dear. I'm going to start cleaning up dinner. Nice to see you again, Olivia."

"Mom, don't leave me-" Liv nudged Casey into a seat. "Ow. I could have you arrested-"

"Try it."

"What do you want, Liv?"

"Is that all you have to say to me? You left Don with out so much as a note, and you ask me what I want? Casey, that man is half broken because you walked out! Ronny is freaking out because Mommy left him without even saying good bye!" Olivia was towering the blonde woman who was sitting, and for the first time in the 11 years they've known each other, Casey was afraid.

"Liv, stay out of it."

"He's the only father I've ever known, and you tell me to stay out of it? He gave up his career for, and now you walk out because it gets a little hard?"

"Olivia, I needed some time away from him. After what happened the last year, I don't think I can look at him without wondering if he hates me for what happened." Olivia sat next to her friend, who started crying. Olivia had been the first to get to the hospital when Casey was stabbed. Casey hadn't cried for the loss of her baby; not when she found out, not when she got home, and not when she packed away all of Ronny's old baby things. For the first time since it happened, Casey was able to cry. "I should have just waited for him...or taken a cab."

"Casey, its not your fault."

"How...how can you say that? I did everything wrong. I took the subway, and ...look what happened?" Casey sobbed into her friend's shoulder while Liv comforted her. Carol Lynn stood in the doorway and listened.

"No one blames you, least of all, Don. Don would do anything to fix this and have you back, but you can't keep hiding from him, Casey." Casey's sobs grew quieter and eventually stopped. "Hey," Liv said, tilting the woman's chin up to look her in the eyes. "Come home with me, and we'll fix your marriage before you break my dad's heart."

"I don't know if I can."

"You need to try. Don't give up on him because you both made mistakes. Come home," she said again, eyes pleading. "We're not much of a family when one is broken and won't let us help fix it."

* * *

Hope you liked that! Its still a little rough, but its ready in my opinion. 


	4. Chapter 4

Here's Chapter 4. Sorry its taken me a while, been motivated with other stories :)

Enjoy!

* * *

It had been a full 2 weeks since his wife walked out, and now she stood infront of him, tears streaming down her cheeks. She wanted him to hold her, tell her that he forgives her for everything, but he doesn't. He just turned away and left her standing at the front door. Casey swallowed hard and stepped in.

"I didn't say you could come in," Don said flatly.

"Can we talk?"

"We tried that, Casey. We tried to get help, and you ran away from it. Why should I think you aren't going to do the same now?" Casey sniffled. Don turned to look at her, and was a little surprised to see her crying.

"I'm sorry," she whispered.

"For what? Leaving?"

"For not waiting for you. I was impatient and because of my stupidity, we lost Kale. Its my fault for even taking the subway. I knew I should have waited, or taken a cab, but I wanted to save a little money, and because of that, I was stabbed. I'm sorry I took it out on you; its not your fault," she said very quickly in one breath. "If I had just waited for you...If..." Casey started to breath heavily. "I'm so sorry, Donny," she sobbed. Don wrapped his arms around her and lead her to the couch.

"I know you blame yourself as much as I blame myself, Love. You shouldn't. Its not your fault that you were attacked," he said sothingly. "Casey, working in Special Victims, you should have learned-"

"Not to trust anyone?"

"Not to blame the victim. Will you let me help you through this, Casey?" She nodded, and Don kissed her forehead. "We can get through this, my love. I swear I will not let you go through this alone. I'm sorry that I pushed you away when you needed me, Casey. I should have been there holding you, and not hiding behind Ron. Can you forgive me?" Casey nodded without moving her head from his chest where he held her tightly. "Think we can go back to therapy?" Casey nodded again.

"Don?"

"Hmm?"

"I think we should go on a trip alone; Liv offered to take Ronny for a weekend so we could be alone together-"

"You need to spend time with him, and I need to spend less time with him." Casey looked at him questioningly. "I start work on Monday morning in Queens computer crimes. They needed a captain, and I need to go back to doing something more than playing with toy trains and legos."

"But what about Ron? I have work-"

"Assuming you haven't been fired, Alex is willing to cover your cases for a while. Hannah will take Ron in the morning, and you will be home for 2:30 every afternoon. You're on desk duty for Alex for a while." Casey looked like she was going to argue, but a look from her husband and her mouth snapped closed. "You need to take it slow, Love. Please."

"Daddy?" Ron called wandering down the hall in his favorite pajamas. He stopped when he saw Casey in his father's arms, still crying. "Momma?"

"Hey, Red," she said, wiping her cheeks. She held her hands out for her son, who stood still. "I missed you."

"Daddy," the 4-year-old said softly."I want Daddy." Casey sat back and watched as her sone cimbed into Don's lap.

"Your mother hasn't seen you in two weeks, Ronald. Don't you think you could give her a hug?" Don urged softly to the small boy in his lap.

"She left." Ron turned to his mother. "You left, and daddy cried." He was giving her the icey stare she'd perfected from her mother.

"I know, Lovie, but I needed to take some time to get my head together so I could be a better mommy for you. I'm back, and I'm not leaving you again. I promise, Ronny." Ron hid his eyes in his father's neck. Don felt moisture soaking through his shirt, telling him that his son was crying silently. Don rubbed the little boy's back, and he leaned back on the couch. He pulled a lever, and a foot rest raised from the couch.

"Why don't we just rest here a while, Ronny?" Ronny nodded and snuggled into his father's chest. Casey stretched her legs out along the couch and tucked herself under Don's arm. She leaned in and kissed her son's head. "Mommy's not going anywhere, Ronald." The boy hugged his father a little tighter, and continued to cry softly.

* * *

"MA!" Hannah yelled through the house, "HEY, MA!"

"Hannah?" John called from the hall. "Its 3am. are you dying or bleeding?"

"No..."

"Then get you ass to bed!" he shouted angrily. "We having this thing called WORK in thw morning!"

"But I saved her case!" John pulled his robe on and staggered into the kitchen. All the law books were closed. "He claimed to be Jehovah's Witness, which is why the case was going to be tossed today." John dropped into a chair and picked up Hannah's coffee cup.

"How old?"

"Less than 20 minutes." John downed the last of it. "He claimed to be a Jehovah's witness."

"True."

"His aliby states he was at a poker game with friends. He was in the military for 4 years with a spotless record. He also stated during the trial that he lives next door to the victim in 'the slums of New York' because he can't afford a nicer place as 25 of his income goes to tithing."

"And?"

"Jehovah's witness is against poker, the military, and have no tithing in their church." John let out a soft chuckle. "So, the supression of his DNA based on the claim that its against his religeon is totally false."

"Alex'll kiss you for this." Hannah grinned and took her coffee back from John. She looked into the empty cup, and shot her Papa a dirty look. "Sorry."

"No worries."

"You know, you'd make a pretty good detective." Hannah shrugged. "Go to bed."

"Not yet. I want to go over everything from the last week of trial and build a nice little case for Alex-"

"You already have!"

"I want more. There is so much more I can do, Papa," she said, yawning. John stood and held a hand out for his daughter. She reluctantly took it and followed him down the hall.

"Night, brown-eyed girl."

"Night Papa," she yawned again.

* * *

Alex grinned happily as she hurried through the squadroom with confidence. Her husband was on the phone, deep in conversation, Elliot and Maureen were in the office, door shut, and Maureen's partner was up to his eyeballs in files.

"Thanks...thanks for all your help," John said with a tone of sarcasm that no one in the room could miss. He slammed the phone down and leaned back in his chair. "Pussing-sucking leech..." he muttered.

"Rough day?"

"Yeah, my mother was on the phone, and you know how that goes," he said. "Seriously, the layer of scum in this city is Extra thick this week."

"Oh?"

"The 12-year-old we found living in under a playground slide? That was the number he gave us to call. His mother said that since he's not a foster child, he doesn't bring in any money and to go ahead and keep the kid. She doesn't want him." Alex grimaced. "So, like I said, Puss-sucking leech."

"A logical conclusion."

"What brings you here, oh, darling wife of mine?" he asked, leaning back in his chair.

"Hannah. Hannah Grace Munch is why I'm here."

"Went well, eh?"

"Well," she started. "Well doesn't begin to discribe how today went, John. I offered up evidence that he wasn't a part of the religeon in question, and the DNA was submitted. Guilty on all charges. Maureen'll be thrilled-"

"Maureen is in her daddy's office crying." Alex looked over. "Elliot is ripping her a new one for getting the DNA tossed in the first place."

"That was Casey's fault, not Maureen's."

"Both of the Stabler's have their panties in a bunch right now. Maureen blames herself, Elliot is having trouble with Allie and Olivia, and they clash." Alex sighed.

"ShouldI fix this?"

"Nope. Olivia is already trying - and failing - to fix things for Don and Casey. You go in there, they're bound to bring you down with them." Alex thought about it for a moment. "Alexandra," John whispered. "Let them work through it."

"I Want to, but-"

"For me? It'll just make work harder for both of us if you step into this."

"Fine. I'll stay out of it. Pass the news along?" John nodded as his wife left the squad room.

* * *

Saturday was park day. It was beautiful, and warm, and Olivia was called in to work. Elliot kissed her goodbye and took his kids down to the park to play. He pushed them on the swings, watched them climb and swing across monkey bars, and eventually sat to let the two play together. Half an hour in, Eli ran up to his father, crying.

"What happened?"

"Allie," he answered, shaking. Elliot lifted his son up and hugged him.

"ALLISON PAIGE STABLER!" Elliot yelled to the top of the play structure. "Get Down here NOW!" Elijah sobbed into his father's shoulder as Allie swung down.

"Yes?" she said, angelically.

"Cut the crap. What'd you do to your brother?"

"Nothing!"

"She said she wasn't my real sister," Eli cried. "She said that you wasn't her real daddy."

"We're going home."

"But-"

"Now!"

"NO! Its the truth! You're not my daddy!" Allie sat firm on the bench. Elliot tried to lift her, but she held on tightly. "You're not my daddy!" she screamed. Within seconds, other parents were scrambling around to help the crying girl.

"Let me go! I'm a cop!" Elliot yelled, but it was no good, the crowd refused to listen. Eli cried as he was pulled away by a large man to 'safety' with his sister. Elliot struggled, but an overzealous man punched him, knocking him out.

"Daddy!" Eli screamed, wriggling free. He shook his father;s arm. "Daddy, wake up," he sobbed.

"That's your dad?"

"Yeah," the boy sniffed. "He's a police man."

"What's his name?"

"Cap'n Elliot Patrick Stabler, NYPD Special Victims Unit, 16th pre...precinct. Mommy is Cap'n Olivia Benson Stabler, NYPD Computer crimes, 16th precinct. I'm Elijah Paul Stabler, and my sister's name is-"

"Allison Paige Benson Wilson. My father's name is James Wilson. He's a doctor in Princeton." Eli clamped his mouth closed and stared at his sister.

"He's your step dad?"

"I guess," Allie answered.

"Oh, I am so screwed," the man who hit Elliot said sitting down. "I hit a cop, and I am so screwed." Elliot moaned and opened his eye. The left eye was already swelling shut. "Jeeze, man, I am so sorry. We thought you were trying to-"

"I know. I get it."

"I had no idea she was your step daughter." Elliot froze. Step dad. A simple 4-letter prefix to his title, and it felt like a knife being shoved into his heart. "Do you need to arrest me?"

"No...you were just trying to help a kid. I understand that."

"I told him who you were just like you taught me daddy!" Eli said, pleased that he'd remembered such a long title.

"Good job, son." Elliot touched his eye gently, hissing with pain. "Elijah, Allison, we need to get home."

"Okay, Dad," Allie said.

"You can call me Elliot," he responded. "Seeing as I'm now just a step-dad to you."

* * *

Olivia sighed as she listened to the two talk. There was a huge rift between Elliot and Allie. She refused to call him Dad now. When this all started, Allison was afarid that Elliot didn't want her. Now, it seemed that Allie didn't want Elliot, Eli, or any of Elliot's kids. The only person she seemed all right with was Olivia.

"Can you pass the corn, please?" Allie said, very softly. Elliot carefully lifted the bowl and set it in-front of her. They didn't make any eye contact. "Thanks."

"Any time."

"Can I get a new bike?" Eli asked.

"Sure," Elliot said after a moment's thought. "Do you still have your gift cards from your birthday?"

"Yep! I gots about a million dollars," he said, grinning.

"He has $235," Allie added. "We counted them up before dinner."

"You have enough for a new bike," Olivia said, smiling at her small son. "What about you, Allie?"

"I still have $200 left. Its almost enough for a new iPod," she grinned. "My old one keeps dying on me, no matter how much I charge it."

"How much more do you need?" Liv asked.

"I still need $75. I should be able to get it just after Christmas...unless someone wants to add to the 'Allie's iPod fund' jar?"

"Sorry, you know the deal, you can save your allowence, and gift cards, and then get something big." Allie looked over to Elliot.

"I didn't get my allowence this week," she said shyly.

"Why not ask your father for money?" he said, leaving the table. Olivia sighed and rubbed her forehead.

"Elliot," she called, but the front door slammed. "Allison, you know full well why you didn't get your allowence; you were mean to Eli. Your dad tries so hard to make a good life for you, and if this is how you treat him, then maybe you don't need an allowence at all."

"Why do they even have to live with us? It would be so much easier if it were just you and me, Mom," Allie said, eyes welling up.

"Allison," Liv warned. "Eli is my son as much as you are my daughter, and I don't like that kind of talk." Allie ran from the table and slammed her bedroom door the second she was on the other side.

"Mommy? Why is Allie so mad at Dad?"

"She's not...she's mad at a situation, and it comes out at your father."

"That's not fair," he said, sticking his toungue through the gap in his teeth. "Daddy's so cool."

"I think he is."

"Allie doesn't."

"Allie is going through a lot right now." Eli climbed into his mother's lap, and snuggled back into her chest. "Sweetie, you know how Lizzie, Dickie, Kathleen and Maureen have two mommies?"

"You and Kaffy."

"That's right, me and Kathy," Liv said softly. "Allison has two daddies. James was her first daddy, but he didn't want to be a daddy. So your daddy became her daddy."

"Do I have two dads?"

"Nope. You have one mom and one dad. Come to think of it, you are the only one who has only one mom and only one dad. All your sisters and brothers are a blend. Yours, Mine, and Ours..."

"Do you have two daddies?" Liv nodded. "I want two dads."

"I think your one dad is pretty special. Special enough not to need two."

* * *

Sorry its not as long as the last few chapters. This story isn't coming to me as easily, as I gave up coffee. I'm drinking tea now. I don't know why...just felt like tea.


	5. Chapter 5

This chapter flowed like a waterfall. It would be longer, but I've already started Chapter Six! Beware! Elliot is a jerk!

* * *

Elliot fought tears as he drove. He didn't know where he was heading. He'd been downgraded from Dad to step-father. Elliot's eye had healed, but his heart would take a lot longer. He thought they'd sorted it out over hot chocolate that first night. They talked, he told her about James, and called it good. A week later, she was hacking, and another two weeks, and he wasn't Dad anymore. Before he realized it, Elliot was pulling into Kathy's building. She'd moved out of the house, leaving Maureen and Luke the keys as a wedding gift from her and Elliot. Manhatten was closer to work, the twins, and Elliot and Olivia. They were close now, and Kathy and Liv depended on each other for advice and friendship. Elliot climbed the stairs to the third floor in silence. There was no guarentee Kathy would be home, or in a mood to talk. but he had to try.

"Kathy?" he called as he knocked.

"Elliot, what's wrong?" she asked the second the door was open. Elliot never cried that she'd ever seen. "What happened?"

"She...she hates me, Kathy." Kathy ushered him in and lead him to the sofa. "Allie won't even call me Dad anymore."

"She found out about her father?" Elliot nodded and took ina deep shuddering breath. "What happened?"

"We had hot chocolate and I gave her the history of it. From when Liv found out she was pregnant, all the way up to meeting with Jimmy when she was a year and a half old. We talked, and I thought she was okay. She asked if she could still call me Dad. We were good, and then she hacked Liv's computer."

"Really," Kathy smirked.

"She's very smart!"

"Obviously. Continue."

"Couple of days ago at the park, Eli gets upset when Allie tells him she's not my biological daughter, so I try to get her to leave, and she freaks. Screaming that I'm not her daddy. I get tackled by angry parents." Elliot points at the black eye. "Very large father was pissed. Knocked me out, and while I was out, she said I was her step-father."

"Oh, Elliot," Kathy said, putting her hand on his arm.

"I was so hurt that I told her to call me Elliot."

"I'm surprised Liv didn't give you a second black eye for that move." Elliot looked around the room. "Lyle moved out last night," she explained when he looked at the epty bookshelves.

"Geeze, Kathy, I'm sorry. I thought he was-"

"Great guy? Yeah, but after 4 years olf living together, I still don't want to get married and he moved on. And so now, I'm alone." She picked up the beer she'd started before Elliot knocked on her door. After a sip, Kathy offered it to her ex-husband. He took the bottle and sipped aimlessly at the drink.

"Got anything stronger?"

"Drank that first."

"How drunk are you right now?"

"There was a shot of whisky left, and this is my only beer. I'm good." Elliot rested back against his old couch. He looked at it,remembering that he and Kathy had picked it out a year before the divorce.

"Eight years ago, you were questioning if I was her father, and now she is. Kathy, she's as much my little girl as our three girls are." He stared back up at the ceiling and blinked back tears. "Where did my life go wrong?"

"Excuse me?"

"I had a wife, 4 kids, and then it got all...I miss you Kathy. Were grew up together. You are back to being the same wonderful woman I married 30 years ago-"

"Stop right there, Stabler. You're in-love with Olivia, you have 2 children back with her-"

"One! I have One child with Olivia, and he does just fine without me there 6 days a week." Kathy took the beer away from him. "Olivia hardly talks to me anymore, I work so much, she works almost as much, but different hours. Its so...I feel trapped," he confessed.

"Did you feel trapped before Allison pushed away from you?" Elliot drew his eyebrows together in thought. "I doubt you did."

"I didn't feel trapped. Now she doesn't want me around. Ever. The most she's said to me outside of asking me to pass food at dinner earlier tonight is Goodnight Elliot." He snatched back the beer, which he dropped and spilled on his shirt. "Damn!" he swore, picking the bottle up.

"Hang on, I think I have one you can wear. Its Lyle's," she said, walking back to the bedroom. She returned and stopped, seeing him without his shirt. Kathy forgot how built the man was. "Here," she said gently offering the shirt up. Elliot pulled the shirt on, which was very tight on him. Kathy smirked. "Looks really good on you, El.

"Heh, thanks. I feel a little gay in this. Its so...girly."

"Its blue-"

"Its a baby blue t-shirt that is 3 sizes too small."

"But it shows off the chestage, and damn but your eyes look even more...You should leave."

"Why?"

"Lyle moved out yesterday, bu hasn't been in the bedroom in months. I may break a few laws-" Elliot quieted Kathy with a kiss. She fought for a split second before giving in to him. Before he could think about what he was doing, he waslpushing her toward the bedroom. As soon as she was on the bed, Elliot looked into her eyes. "Elliot, we can't-"

"We really," he paused to kiss her. "Should stop."

"You're married." Elliot backed off and looked at Kathy again. She was right; He was cheating on his wife. He jumped back like he'd been burned. "Elliot?"

"God, Liv is gonna kill me," he whispered.

"Calm down-"

"I've never cheated before, not on you, not on Liv. Kathy...I gotta ge tout of here." He grabbed his beer covered shirt and headed for the door. "I'm gonna-"

"Keep your distance?"

"Tell her."

"What?"

"If it had been reversed, I would have told you. She'll kill me, but I can't hide this from her, Kathy," he said holding his head. "Jesus, what'd I do?"

"Elliot?"

"I gotta...FUCK!" he yelled as he left. Kathy went to the phone and dialed Olivia's number.

"Liv, its Kathy," she said. "He's headed home, but we need to talk first."

* * *

"I want DADDY!" Ron screamed. Casey tried holding her son, but he kicked until she was forced to put him down before she dropped him. "I hate you!" he cried and ran from his mother. The boy was fast, and made it all the way to the master bedroom. He was in the closet hiding under his dad's suits. Casey climbed in behind him and sat next to him, under the hanging coats.

"Nice hiding place," she said softly.

"Go away."

"Sorry, I made a promise that I wouldn't do that. Remember?" The little boy sniffled. "Can you tell me why you're so mad at me, Red?"

"I missed you, and I don't want to miss you any more."

"I missed you, too."

"Daddy cried a lot."

"I'm sorry I made Daddy cry," Casey said. The boy still wouldn't look at her. "Ronald Cragen, I promise I will not leave you again-"

"You said that before when you got hurt." Casey took in a deep breath. She'd been in the hospital for nearly a month due to comlications after surgery. "You lied."

"I was scared, Lovie."

"Mommies don't get scared."

"Not true. I was scared when I found out we were going to have you." The boy turned to him. "I figured I wouldn't be a good mom. I was scared when I got hurt, and when I got sick after. I was scared when I had to go back to work. I was scared when I left."

"Why?"

"Ron, I thought I hurt you and your daddy worse than I thought I could fix it. I thought you would be better off with no mommy than with me as a mommy." Casey wiped the tears streaming down her cheeks. "Tell me what I can do to make you feel safe again, Ronny, and I'll try really hard to make it happen."

"How 'bout a baby brother?"

"No, sweeite, when I got hurt, they had to take that part out of me that holds babies." Ronny looked at his bare feet. "How about you be my only baby, and I spend all my free time playing with you and your dad and the train sets?"

"Okay," he said shyly.

"And how about I give you all the kisses you could possibly want?"

"Yuk."

"Okay, no."

"How 'bout hugs?" he asked in a little voice. Casey gathered her son up onto her lap and hugged him tightly.

"Oh, I missed you, Red," she whispered. "Momma missed you so much."

"Love you, Momma."

"I love you, too, Ronny."

* * *

Olivia sat in the livingroom on the couch that faced the door. Elliot would see her the second he opened the door. He would also see the hair-brush she happened to have in her hand when Kathy called. Kathy confessed everything to Olivia, and stated it had been her fault. Olivia thanked her quietly, hung up the phone, and sat on the couch in silence.

The only words she said were to send Eli to bed, and Allie to pack. Seeing their mother so angry, they obeyed without an argument.

"Olivia, I need-" his words fell short as he ducked the brush. "I screwed up tonight, Liv."

"No shit." Olivia very calmly walked into the bedroom and pulled her suitcase out.

"Where are you going?"

"Allie and I are going to find an apartment. Eli will stay with you until we're settled, and you can see him any time you want." She stopped speaking at this point. Elliot opened his mouth to say something, but one look from his wife and his mouth was snapped closed. She'd walked out before, but she was pissed. Now, she was so far beyond pissed that he didn't think any amount of pleading could help.

"I wish you would forgive me. I would take it back if I could, Olivia."

"You can't. And I want nothing more to do with you, Stabler." She zipped her bag closed, unlocked her badge and gun, holstered it, and pulled a jacket over. Allie was standing in the door, dressed, with her rolling duffle behind her. Liv looked at the little girl who looked so much like Olivia did as a child. "You ready to go, Allison?" The child nodded and Liv took her hand. "Good bye," she said coldly over her shoulder.

"Bye Elliot," Allie said soflty. Liv lead her daughter to the elevator and they waited in silence. Soon, the two were walking the streets hoping to catch a cab. "Where are we going, Mom?"

"Grandpa Don's house, I guess."

"Elliot'll come find us there," Allie warned.

"Did you hate him so much, Allie, that you had to push him away from both of us?" Liv asked staring angrily down at the child.

"He told me not to call him Dad."

"You're lying, Allison."

"Mom, I am not lying. All I want is to meet this man who is my father, and you can't even let me see what he looks like. I told Eli at the park because he said he was Elliot's favorite. I didn't mean for him to hurt, Mom. I love Elliot-" Liv knelt down to look at her daughter. "I'm sorry I made Elliot hate us, Mommy."

Suddenly Olivia looked into her daughter's tear-filled eyes and wondered if her mother had been so angry at her. She wondered if the rage she felt was from her mother's side or her fathers. She wanted so badly to hit Elliot, but instead walked out. She thought back to when she was a child and didn't like one of her mother's boy friends, she raised hell the way Allie did, and her mother hit her for it. Allison didn't hate Elliot, she was hurt that she'd been lied to her entire life. Olivia picked her daughter up and hugged her close.

"Sweet heart, Elliot and I had a fight because he made a big mistake. He hurt me. It had nothing to do with you, Allison. I swear."

"Mom?"

"What, baby?"

"Will you forgive him?"

"I don't know."

"Did he lie to you, too?"

"He kissed someone else," Liv explained. "When you're married, you can't do that."

"Tell Kathy, she'll chew him out for you."

"Kathy is the woman he kissed, Allison."

"He is so busted," Allie said under her breath. Liv had to smirk lightly at the situation. Finally, a cab stopped in front of the two.

"We're headed to the house of Don and Casey Cragen," Liv said, and gave the address.

"Mom?"

"What baby?"

"I'm sorry," the child whispered.

"I know. But we'll be okay. All right?" Allie nodded and snuggled into her mother's arms. "I promise we'll be okay."

* * *

Hannah paced nervously as she waited for John and Alex to get home. They were finishing up the case she'd worked on. Hannah wanted to know if her research actually helped. It was nearly 11, and they were definitely out late. Hannah picked up the phone to dial her papa's cell phone, but hung it up instead, not wanting to intrude if they were having a romantic moment in the parking garage. She'd made that mistake once before. Hannah shuddered at the thought. She flipped through the channels on the TV in the kitchen for a few moments, but turned it off when she heard keys in the door.

"Ma? Papa?" she called, running through the condo. She stopped when she saw her parents walking in with a small child. "Who's this?"

"Hannah," John started. "This is Hope, your little sister. She is going to stay here for the weekend if that's okay with you."

"Hi Hope," Hannah said, looking at the little girl who looked so much like Hannah. "I, uh, I haven't seen you since you were four." The little girl bit her lip. "Papa, can we talk a minute?"

"Sure," John said following Hannah into the back room. "You okay?"

"What happened?"

"You won the case for us."

"No, I mean with Hope. What hapened?" John sat on the edge of Hannah's bed.

"She's been bouncing around through foster care since we found you guys, and her latest 'parents' dumped their own child in our laps today. When I went to investigate, she was there, and she wasn't talking. Alex worked a little magic and we have temporary custody of her until a permanent home can be found."

"She's, what, 9?"

"Ten, nearly eleven."

"They're not going to be able to place her, Papa." John shrugged. "She can have my bed. I'll take the guest room."

"Hannah-"

"She's my sister, she's probably terrified, and I want her to feel safe. My room is a lot more inviting than the guest room." John sighed and nodded.

"Alex and I talked on the way to court while she was getting medical clearence. We'd like to adopt her...give her the same chances and life we gave you," John said softly. Hannah pulled him down into a hug and left her bedroom.

"Hey, Ma," Hannah called. "Congrats on winning the case today," Hannah said hugging Alex.

"Thank you for helping, Shorty."

"There's coffee." Alex and John took the hint and left Hannah and Faith alone in the living room. "So...Hope," she started. "Do you remember me at all?"

"No," Hope said. "You my sistah?"

"Yes," Hannah said. "I used to take care of you when you were really little, just after our mother died."

"You call them Jews Ma and Papa-"

"Hold it," Hannah said. "They adopted me, and you, my little sister, were born Jewish. Curly dark hair, big brown eyes. You are Jewish. Deal."

"Screw this-" Hope said standing to leave. Hannah stepped in front.

"I get that you had it rough, but these people are two of the most generous people you'll ever meet. They gave me a home, put me in school, and gave me an incredible family. They taught me that all that crap that happened when were were little isn't normal, and that there is a better life to make for yourself. You may have been taught to hate Jewish people, but you have to give John and Alexandra a chance."

"Why should I?" the girl spat backlat her. "They just gonna give me back."

"Is that what happened to you?"

"I had a family, and they gave me back. And so I got a new one who gave me back too. What's gonna stop them?" Hannah looked toward the kitchen, hoping her father was listening and would come to the rescue. "See? You don't know."

"Hope, they will do everything they can to give you a good life. They are good people who won't leave you behind. They've never left me behind, and no one in this family will ever tell you that you aren't family."

* * *

Thirteen days after Olivia packed up and left, she and Allie were looking at apartments in the city. The first day or so, they looked a little here and there, but now they were serious about leaving Don's house. Casey was home, and they needed time to heal from her break down.

After meeting with a divorce lawyer, Olivia decided to get her own place with Allie. She'd spoken with Elliot three times, and each time it was the same. He begged for forgiveness, and swore that it was only a kiss. Kathy'd told Olivia everything. They gone into her bedroom and were on her bed kissing before she reminded him that he was married. Elliot never denied it, so Olivia knew Kathy wasn't lying.

Kathy had called because she wanted Olivia to know that Elliot hadn't been the one to make the first move. Kathy did. Liv was silent on the phone for a moment before thanking Kathy for calling and hung up on her.

Olivia stared around the little apartment. Over the bathroom, there was a loft for Allie to sleep in, spiral stairs leading up. Liv could fit two beds up there for when Eli would be there, but she had a feeling he wouldn't be there often. Eli had always prefered Elliot to anyone else, even now. It felt like her kids had chosen sides in an underlying war that broke out years ago when Elliot took Don's job. Since then, the two had been drifting further and further apart, and now barely spoke to each other anymore.

Allie rarely saw Elliot as it was, and Eli saw even less. Olivia felt as though her marriage had faded away into a routine of coming and going, paying bills, and buying groceries. The kids had more toys and gadgets than they should have because Elliot felt guilty about never being there. So did Olivia.

Now was a time for change. She could start over with her daughter, and be a better mom than her own; healthy foods, bed times, curfews, and time where they'd be together when Allie was out of school.

"Do you like the place?" She asked Allie. Serena never asked if Olivia liked the places they looked at.

"I like the upstairs," Allie said, eyes bright. "But the last one was better."

"How so?" the landlord asked. Olivia smiled. They hadn't looked at an apaartment, but instead talked about how to lower the rent to a number more affordable. That was something Serena and Olivia had done several times.

"Allie, we shouldn't talk about that," Olivia whispered.

"But it was bigger, and they had a good parking spot. You said it was great!"

"I know, sweetie, but this place is closer to your school."

"You're losing points for your cause, Mama," she said, arms folded across her chest. The landlord laughed.

"I'll lower the rent $100/ a month as long as the comedien stays," he said, patting the kids head. "Besides, it'll make the building more comfortable to have a decorated police officer living here."

"How did-"

"I watch the news, Captain Stabler." The man pulled out a pen and the papers. "I need you to fill this out, and when your credit comes back, you can sign the lease and move in. Should be 24 hours when it comes back, and another day and you can move in."

"Thank you."

"How long of a lease do you want to sign?"

"Forever?" Allie asked a little sadly.

"Can we start with a 3 month? I'm in the process of leaving my husband and I don't know what's going to happen after the trial separation." Allie climbed the stairs up to her loft. The man nodded and watched as Liv filled out the paper work.

"Cheating bastard?"

"With his ex-wife."

"Men are scum," the man said, grinning. "Mine left me for a woman."

"Women are bitchy."

"So are men." Olivia chuckled and handed the paper work off to her would-be landlord. "I'll give you a call tomorrow."

* * *

Next chapter: Hope and Hannah get to know each other, Olivia discovers more about herself as she sees how her mother lived, and Elliot hits rock-bottom.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter one of Give A Little Bit was summer of 2007, making Chapter 1 of THIS story begining of summer 2016.

* * *

Allie threw the new blankets over her bed and tucked them into place. The child was always clean; bed always made, hair neatly pulled back, and nails never had dirty. She was obsessive with it at times. Olivia knew Jimmy was a clean person, and wondered what part of her daughter's genetics came from him. Allie was a tom-boy. She wore shorts and t Shirts, converse shoes, and refused to get her ears pierced. But her taste in things; like her bed covers for instance, was very girly, and very sophisticated. She chose a white quilt, covered in tiny soft pink roses with sage green leaves. Her room had to be lovely, or she wasn't comfortable.

Olivia never understood it, but she allowed her daughter to decorate her room as she saw fit.

"Hey, Mom?" Allie called as she slid down the banister in a spiral. The was an audible thud as her sneakers hit the ground. "Mom?"

"In here," Liv called from the only actual bedroom.

"Can we get a cat?"

"Nope, I'm allergic." Allie sighed. "We can get a dog when you're ten, and can clean up after him. Okay?"

"Sounds fair."

"Elliot is coming by tonight to see the place and drop off your brother for the week." Allie nodded. "I'll behave myself if you do, Allie Cat."

"I guess I can be nice."

"We need to go shopping today for food. Got shoes?" Allie nodded and the two set off. "You'll have to help carry them up, okay?" Allie nodded again.

"Maybe we can bring my old wagon to do shopping when we get a lot of food?"

"Smart kid," Liv said, smoothing her daughter's hair down. Liv locked her apartment and the left the building. The grocery store was half a block away, and had an organic section that Olivia wanted to try. "When my mom and I were on our own, all we had to eat for weeks at a time was candy and ice cream. I don't want to do that to you, so, we're going to get good foods, okay?"

"Can we get _some_ junk food?"

"Of course! But we're going to get healthy food first. Okay?" Allie nodded as they stepped into the store. Olivia picked up fresh fruits and veggies for her and Allie.

"How about this!?" Allie asked with excitement, holding up a pineapple. Liv nodded and put it in the basket. She found herself getting things she'd never thought about trying because Elliot didn't like that kind of thing. She bought whole grain bread instead of white, soy-nut butter instead of peanut butter, fresh berries instead of jam. And they got, for the first time in years, juice. There would be no soda, no gallon of chocolate milk when there wasn't any plain milk.

"Allie, would you like to try these?" Liv asked, holding up 'All Natural Cheetos.' Allie nodded and studied the yogurt.

"Alex always has these at her house. Can we get some?" Liv took the yogurt and put a few in.

"Why not one treat?" Allie picked up a chandy bar and tossed it in. "Let's go."

As the two made their way up to their apartment, arms full of grocery bags, Olvia decided that it was worth the effort to drive to the store next time. She was dropping a bag when she felt someone take it for her.

"Thanks," she said.

"No problem, Liv." It was Elliot. He and Elijah were an hour early. "I know I'm early, but I wasnted to spend a little time with the kids before I leave. That's okay, right?"

"Sure," she said, curtly. She opened the door and set the bags on the counters.

"Eli, come see our room," Allie said running up the stairs.

"Nice place."

"Thanks." She started putting the food away. Elliot helped, and put the cold foods in the fridge.

"Feeling a little rabbit-like today?" he said, trying to joke.

"I want her to eat healthy foods. My mom would buy nothing but junk, and I'm going to do better than she did...if that's okay with you-"

"Olivia, I was just trying to lighten the mood."

"What do you want, Elliot?" she asked.

"You and Allie to come home. Please," he pleaded. "Olivia, I'm nothing without you. You're my wife and we belong together-"

"Save it! You cheated, Elliot! She may have started it, but you went into her bedroom and you kissed her, and made out with her in her bed! I would have understood if it were anyone else, and maybe I could have forgiven you, but Kathy? You went to your ex-wife? You're lucky I didn't castrate you for this one, Stabler." Elliot's face went stone cold.

"I made a mistake, and I will spend the rest of my life regretting it. But I will not beg you to come home, Olivia Benson, if you are going to be so cold and violent. I love you, and I miss you. The ball is in your court, and you get to make the next move." Elliot turned to leave. "I'll be back on Friday to pick him up." With that he left.

* * *

Hannah walked along side the bike as it made its way though the park. Hope had never had a bike, so Hannah got her old one from storage and was teaching her sister to ride. The ten-year-old wobbled but was gaining her balance quickly. Hannah wasn't ready to let go, but Hope was doing well. She let go of the seat and Hope was riding on her own.

"Go!" Hannah shouted, running along side the bike. "You're doing it, Hope!"

"Oh, kick ass!" the kid said as she rode. "Hannah, I'm-" Hannah caught the girl as she fell, and the two tumbled to the ground.

"Nice work, Hope." The child climbed off her sister.

"Thanks for giving me your bike, Hannah." Hope dusted the shorts off. She was too big for Hannah's skirts and blouses that John had first gotten her, but was in the right size for Hannah's khaki shorts and t shirt phase. "And all your old clothes."

"Papa'll get you new clothes this weekend. We just had to get so much else done for you to live with us, y'know?" Hope nodded and for the first time since they'd met, Hope looked like a child to Hannah. "Hope," Hannah started as they found a park bench to sit at. "Alex and John are really trying to adopt you."

"I know."

"If they can't, we'll find you a good family," Hannah offered.

"Will you still visit me?"

"As much as I can."

"Hannah? Why did they adopt you and not me?"

"You were little. Kids under 7 are usually very easy to place. You had a family who wanted to adopt you the minute the story broke. No one wanted me, and John was the cop that put our dad in jail for what he did to us. John saved our lives, and I asked him if he could adopt me." Hannah sighed sadly. "Your adoptive family backed out when you were in their foster care because of what had happened before. They didn't know they were getting a child from such severe abuse."

"They gave up on me?"

"Yeah. John won't. John is terrific. You get to meet most of the family on Sunday. We're going to Grandpa Don's for a party. Everyone'll be there."

"Okay..."Hope said, fear in her voice.

* * *

Don flipped the last burger onto the grill. His back yard was full again, but the happy chatter that he'd missed wasn't happening yet. Elliot and Olivia weren't speaking, the twins were quiet, Allison was hiding behind Liv, and Eli was holing tightly to Elliot's hand, and John and Alex were late. His little family was broken again, and Olivia wasn't going to be able to fix this one.

"Okay, enough already. You and you, my office, now," he called, pointing at Liv and Elliot. They obeyed, following Don into his house and then into his office. "What the hell is going on between you two?"

"Don, you know-"

"I know you spent three weeks living with Allie in my guest room, and not taking any calls from Elliot. I know you were pissed. I know you left. What I am asking you now is why? Why did you leave? "

"Now isn't the best-"

"Benson, talk."

"He made out with his ex-wife," Olivia mumbled, broken-hearted. "He's a cheating, lying bastard."

"Elliot, is this true?" Elliot nodded guiltily. "Look at your wife."

"Don-"

"LOOK at your wife!" Elliot turned, and to his surprise, Olivia was crying. "You broke her heart, Stabler. I told you years ago when you sat in my office that if you broke her heart, you would be out of my family. I want you to get your coat, and get the hell out, you waste of human flesh," he said through gritted teeth. Elliot stood frozen for a minute before Don took a step towards him. "I don't want to see you back here again, Stabler."

"Don-"

"Go!"

"Olivia, I will do anything to make it up to you-"

"Elliot, leave. Now." Elliot left the room without another word. Olivia sat back in the chair, crying for the first time since she'd left. The shock had worn off now, and she was broken. "Liv?" he said, gently.

"How could he?" she whispered. Don hugged her close. "How could he just...cheat...like that?"

"He made a mistake, Liv," Don soothed. Casey poked her head into the office. "Not now," Don mouthed.

"Elliot took off, and left Eli here, and he's freaking," Casey whispered.

"I'll go," Don said. "Can you stay with her a while?" Casey nodded.

"Liv, what happened?"

"I filed for legal separation a few days ago, and we're considering divorce." Casey felt the air being sucked out of her lungs. "He cheated on me."

"Bastard."

"But why'd he leave Eli?"

"Eli tried to follow him, and Elliot screamed at him to stay with you, and left." Liv wiped her eyes and stood to leave.

"I'll calm him down long enough for John to make whatever announcement he wanted to make, and leave you guys to have a happy party." Casey nodded and followed her out. Don was holding Eli in the big recliner that Don had come to call his "Grandpa chair." Eli was crying softly while Don spoke to him. Liv couldn't hear what was being said, but the boy nodded and calmed down. A few more words, and Eli hugged don and climbed down from his lap.

"Mommy?" he said softly. Olivia lifted him up. "Can I stay with Grandpa 'til Daddy comes back?"

"You can spend the night here, but you should live with me at my new apartment, sweetie."

"But I don't want a girlie room. Gandpa Don siad it was okay for a couple of nights. I could sleep in Ronny's room."

"We'll talk more later." She set her son down and took a seat on the couch next to Don's chair. "Don-"

"He said that Allie's room is very pink, and he would like to stay the night here. I said I would love to have him, and he was always welcomed in my home," Don said. "I didn't think he'd ask to move in."

"He asked to live here?" Don nodded.

"Liv, he's just unsure of everything-"

"Don, Elliot left hm here, and I don't know if he's coming back."

"Why don't you think about letting Elijah live with me and Casey for a while? Not long, just a few weeks while someone pounds a little sense into Elliot, and he gets his act together." Olivia nodded blankly, and Don rested his hand over hers. "We're going to help you through this, Liv."

"How?"

"I don't know."

"Love? John's here." Liv and Don stood and went out to the back porch, Eli was in Dickie's lap, reesting his back against his brother's chest.

"Everyone, this is Hope, Hannah's little sister. We were given the okay to file for adoption yesterday!" John said, happily. Soft congratulations and greetings from everyone came at the family of four. "Why is everyone so quiet?"

"Daddy left," Eli said.

"That bad, Liv?" Olivia nodded.

"Let's focus on the good today," Liv said smiling down at Hope. "Welcomed to the family," she said gently.

"Thanks," Hope said softly.

"I'm going to take Allie and head out. Good seeing everyone," she said leaving before she started crying again.

* * *

It would be over soon. All the pain he'd brought on to his families, all the shit he'd buried them in in the last 30 years would be gone. Two wives, 6 kids, and not one actually stayed. He'd done this to them. It was his fault. He hurt Kathy, he hurt his children, and now he'd hurt Liv. His friends had turned their back on him completely. Kathy and Olivia both wanted nothing to do with him. Dickie, Lizzie and Kathleen had stopped speaking to him all together, and Maureen would only talk about work.

Elliot had thrown it all away.

"I'm sorry," he whispered as the blood oozed from his wrist, spilling onto the table. After a moment, he began to feel sick and light headed. Elliot laid his head down on the cool wood of the old table. In the distance as his vision blurred and his ears started ringing, he heard keys in the door, and Liv's voice called something about clothes for Elijah.

"Elliot? Oh, God," she screamed. "Allison, get me some towels!" Allie stood perfectly still staring at the blood that had dripped from the table. "GO NOW!" The child didn't move. Liv ran past her and grabbed a few towels from the bathroom and covered Eliot's wrists. She picked up her cell phone and dialed 911.

"Liv," he whispered once before blacking out.

"This is Captain Olivia Stabler," she said, giving her badge number. "I need a bus here NOW! I have an officer down." She took his belt from his pants and cuffed his arm to try and cut off blood supply. She shot off the address into the phone as she cared for her husband. On the counter there was a note. All it said was 'I'm Sorry, Olivia.' She pocketed the note and looked at the knive across the table. After wiping the handle clean, she threw it on the floor. "Allison, I need you to be completely silent. I am going to tell them someone broke in when your dad left the door unlocked. Do you understand?" Allie nodded. "You can NOT tell them I touched the knife, or that I took the note. Got it?" Allie nodded again.

"What happened, Mom?"

"Someone came in and cut your dad's wrist. Okay?" Allison nodded, staring at the blood on her mother's clothes.

* * *

"Liv," the doctor said. "You're lying."

"Excuse me?"

"The angle of the cut shows me that he did it himself." Olivia walked the man into a corner.

"How long have we known each other?"

"Better part of 14 years."

"Please, don't report it as attempted suicide. Let us handle it. Please," she pleaded. "If you report him, his whole career is flushed. He's a good cop, and a great captain." The man studied her eyes for a moment.

"I'll keep him here a week. IF you can meet the requirements, I'll release him to you, no psych notes. Just an accidental cutting." Olivia nodded. "You have someone with him at all times, awake, and he sees a private shrink every day." Olivia nodded. "I'll put in a call to Rebecca. She owes me a big favor." Olivia nodded again.

She watched the doctor leave and joined the family in the waiting room.

"Liv?"

"We need a full watch on him for a while. He's going to see a shrink every day, and this is going to stay off his record."

"I'll take days," Luke offered. "Four hour shifts?"

"I can take noon to 4," Maureen said. Kathy was standing behind her oldest daughter.

"I can take care of the kids," Kathy offered. Olivia pushed past Maureen.

"You know, Kathy, this wouldn't have happened if you'd have kept your damn hands off of my husband. I don't give a rat's ass how much you had to drink before he showed up, crying. You did this." Liv took Allie in her arms and stalked out of the hospital.

* * *

Hope sat on the edge of her bed and listened as Alex and John talked about Elliot. Hannahe was on her own bes staring up at theceiling, crying silently. She didn't know how bad today was for her new little family.

"Hannah?"

"What?"

"Why's he try to kill hisself?"

"Because he has problems that he doesn't know how to solve. He's a monumental idiot." Hannah sniffled. "He hurt a lot more people today other than himself, Hope."

"John's going to take care of him," she answered.

"We all are. We're going to make sure he gets through this."

"Why? He wanna die, let him die." Hannah fought the urge to slap the child.

"When I had NO ONE, these people took me out of that filthy little rat hole we lived in, gave me a home, a new life, and the strongest family I could have ever hoped for! When Papa got shot, all of them took care of us. When Don lost his job, we ALL helped him and Casey get back on their feet. When Casey got stabbed and lost her baby, we ALL were at the hospital every day! Now Elliot and Olivia need us, you damn well better believe I'll be there to help him through this," Hannah hissed angrily at the child.

* * *

Elliot opened his eyes. His hands were numb and his arms felt like they were on fire. He blinked a few times, trying to remember what had happened. He looked at his bandaged wrists and remembered. Tears stung his eyes. He sniffled loudly, and someone near-by was moving.

"El?" Olivia's voice called. "Elliot, look at me," she said genlty. He turned his eyes to his wife.

"Why?"

"What?"

"Why didn't you just let me do one thing right," he said, no tone to his voice. A hand slapped him hard across the face. "OW!"

"Did that hurt?"

"Yes!"

"GOOD! Elliot," she started. "Do you know what you did to your family today?" He stared. "You scared everyone. You took away the safety that our children count on every day, and you took away the trust we all had in you. Why did you do it?"

"I hurt everyone,"

"You hurt me when you kissed kathy, but we could have fixed that." She wiped tears that had streaked her face. "Elliot, you did a permanent solution to a temporary problem. If I hadn't come home, you would have died. Do you know what that would have done to Allie? To see you dead? She already thinks that she's the reason I moved out."

"She was with you?"

"When isn't she with me, El?" He smiled lightly, and looked over to see the child asleep on the chair. "Refused to go with Don."

"She's certainly a stubborn one," he said.

"Do you love Allie?"

"With all my heart, Liv. You know that."

"Then talk to her. Allison, wake up." Olivia nudged her daughter. "Rise and shine, valentine." Allie stretched and yawned. "Your dad wants to talk to you." She lifted the small 8-year-old up onto Elliot's bed, and left the room.

"Hi, Allie."

"There was a lot of blood," she said, casting her eyes down. "I thought you were dead."

"I know, sweetie."

"I'm sorry I made you so sad," she sobbed, hugging him tightly.

"Oh, Allie, you didn't make me sad. You never make me sad." He hugged her and smoothed her hair gently. "You've mnade me happy from the minuteI found out you were going to be born, Allie Cat." She sniffled lightly. "I'm the one who named you, Allison Paige."

"James didn't name me?"

"I wasn't very clear about that, was I?" She shook her head. "You know where babies come from, right?"

"The mommy and the daddy go into the bedroom-"

"A simple Yes will do."

"Yes, I know."

"Your Mom...did that with Jimmy, but he left a few days later. He was only there for that part of your life. It was several weeks later that we found out you were going to be born. I was right there with your mom when she read the test. I was holding her hand when we were told you were a little girl, and I felt you kick from inside. I was there for all of it, Allie. When you were born, I held you before your Mommy did, and brought you out to meet Uncle Fin and John, and Grandpa Don." Allie sat as still as she could, mesmerized by her dad's voice. "And the whole time your mother was pregnant with you, I told myself that I would be your daddy whether or not your Mommy loved me the way I will always love her."

"Why?"

"Because I loved you from the moment I heard your Mommy say she as pregnant." Allie sniffed again. "And do you know what else makes you my daughter?"

"Adoption papers?"

"There's that, but even more so," he said. "I chose you to be my family. Olivia chose Don as her father, Your older brother and sisters chose Liv as their second mom, John chose Hannah as much as Hannah chose John. I picked you. That makes you more my daughter than the other three."

"But what about James?"

"When he saw your mommy pregnant, he ran so fast there was smoke. When he met you, he held you for less than a minute before you threw up on him. Trust me, you're better off without him." Elliot kissed his daughter's head.

"Daddy?" she said, softly. Elliot's heart soared at the term.

"What?"

"Don't hurt your wrists again," she whispered into his neck. "I'll make Mom come home, and I'll be really really nice to Elijah."

"Allie, I didn't do this because of you, Honey." She looked up at him. "I hurt your mother very badly, and I didn't think I could ever fix it."

"You can't fix it if you're dead, Dad."

"I know, sweetie." Allie snuggled down into his arms.

"If you could go back and change what you did, would you have done it?"

"No. Never."

"Good, that means you won't do it again." Allie closed her eyes and rested against hier dad. "Love you, Daddy," she said softly as she started to doze off in his arms.

"I love you, too, Allie."

* * *

So Chapter 7 in half way done! I'm writing fast now, yippie!


	7. Chapter 7

I finished this chapter last night, but was too tired to edit and post it. Sorry bout the wait!

Enjoy my friends!

* * *

Liv carried her little daughter up the stairs to her loft, and laid her gently in her bed. The girl was tired and slept throught the drive home. She didn't even wake up when her mother took her from Elliot's arms. Olivia listened to the messages on her cell phone as she changed out of the blood soaked clothes. Kathleen, Rose, and Alexander would be flying in the next morning to help with Elliot, Kathy apologuised in several messages, Maureen and Luke called to check on her, and Don let her know that Eli was doing well. Olivia made her way into the kitchen as she pulled her pajama bottoms up. After a few minutes of staring into the fridge, she grabbed a yogurt smoothie and sat on the old couch that a friend had given her. 

Her hands were stained with his blood still. The events of the day caught up with Olivia and she ran to the bathroom to throw up. As soon as she finished, she rinsed her mouth, and stared at the blood on her hands. It wasn't thick red anymore, it was dark and dried. She scrubbed until all of Elliot's blood had long since washed down the drain, and now her own blood oozed from her hands where she'd scrubbed them raw. Now the sink was bright red with her own, and she was sobbing.

"Mommy?"

"Go to bed."

"No! You're bleeding," she screamed. Allie brought her a towel and covered her mothers hands as she'd seen her mother do with her father earlier that day. "What am I supposed to do Mommy?" she asked, shaking.

"Honey-"

"Daddy hurt himself, and now you! Why? Why do you guys do this?" she asked, tears flowing.

"I'm fine, I just scrubbed too hard with the nail brush," Liv said, embarassed. She removed the towel to show that it wasn't bad, just scratched. "I just scrubbed way too hard."

"Why?"

"I had...I needed..."Liv started crying again and held her daughter. "We're going to be fine, sweetie, okay?"

"I know."

"Good."

"Mom," Allie said, sitting back on the bathroom floor. "Did this ever happen to you?"

"Did what ever happen to you?"

"You lived with just your mom," Allie said. "Did she hurt herself?"

"Yes, honey. She did. She hurt herself, and she hurt me."

"How did she hurt you?"

"She would hurt herself by drinking too much and the she would say very mean things to me, and hit me." Allie nodded. "It hurt me a lot when she would drink. I promised myself I would never do that to you and your brother."

"Then why are you and Dad hurting me?" Olivia froze. "Dad hurt me when he lied, and when he cut himself. You hurt me by hurting your hands." Olivia started shaking. "Mom, you and dad are all I have, don't leave me." Olivia gathered the child onto her lap and rocked her gently.

* * *

Hope had started to show progress. She was making an effort to keep her side of the room clean, she showered and dressed herself in the morning without being reminded, and she was warming up to John and Alex. Hope was far from calling them Ma and Papa. She was calling them Mr. and Mrs. Munch, much to Alex's dismay. Alex married John, but kept her own last name. Finally, nearly a month after they'd move the child in, she was calling the John and Alex. 

The group rode in silence in the elevator up to Elliot's apartment. He'd been home a week and a half, and they were taking their turn to visit him. Fin had moved in, taking time off to help his friend through this.. Luke and Maureen were switching off on night shift, but now it just seemed like a formailty as he was doing so well. Rebecca had released him home, and dropped down to three sessions a week.

The sound coming from the other side of the door had John confused. It was music and laughter. Fin's, Elliot's and Olivia's. He knocked loudly, and the door swung open.

"C'mon in, Munchies," Fin said, smile across his face. He had Olivia at his side, and the two were dancing around the livingroom while Elliot had Allie on his shoulder.

"Hannah?" Hope asked.

"What?"

"Are they crazy?"

"They are strong, funny and the best family you could ever hope for, Hopie. But yes, they are crazy." Hannah was smiling again, like when Hope first met her, which put the child at ease.

"Just checking."

"MUNCH!" Elliot said, grinning. "S'this Hope?" John nodded and Elliot flipped Allie down off his shoulders. "Hello, Hope. I don't think you remember me, but I met you when you were very small."

"You..." Hope said, touching his face. "You and him. Daddy tried to hit him, and you arrested him," she said, hands trembling.

"Yeah, I went to the hospital with you. Held you in the ambulance while we drove." Hope threw her arms around Elliot's neck. "I see I've been accepted," he said, smiling up at John. The song changed to one Olivia loved. She'd fallen in-love with the song while she was pregnant with Allie.

"El, you gotta dance with your woman for this," Fin joked. "The amount I had to listen to this in the squadroom, in the car on pregnant lady food runs. Suddenly I see that I don't ever want to hear this song again," he said, grinning. Liv swatted his shoulder playfully.

"He's got a point. Your favorite song, need a dance partner," Elliot offered, hands out for her. She accepted and they danced through the song. As soon as it ended, they separated, and a blush creeped up her neck. "So, when are you and Allie coming home?"

"I still have 2 months on my lease. We'll talk then," she said.

"Good enough for me," Elliot said, leaning in and kissing her cheek. "So you guys are my babysitters tonight?"

"Something like that," Hannah offered.

"Pizza or Chinese?"

"None of that sounds good, Daddy," Allie said.

"What sounds good to you?"

"Mom makes this spaghetti that'll make your eyes bug out, with wheat garlic bread." Elliot raised an eyebrow.

"Its all organic. The noodles are whole grain instead of egg, and the sauce has veggies in it. Allie, your dad doesn't do organic food-"

"I can give it a try," he offered. "I'd love to try it. My doc wants me to cut out the junk food anyway. I lost a lot of blood, and need to eat healthier foods anyway." He was trying to encourage Olivia to do anything that would help their relationship at this point. Olivia's eyes brightened and she grabbed her wallet.

"I'll be back soon," she said, grinning. "Allie, stay or go?"

"I'll stay." Another big smile from Olivia. As soon as the door closed behind Olivia, Elliot dropped down onto the couch with a happy sigh as the girls ran off to Allie's room. Alex followed to keep close tabs on Hope, leaving Elliot, John and Fin in the living room.

"Good failure."

"You okay, El?"

"Maybe this wasn't a failed attempt," he said touching his wrists. "Maybe...maybe it was a second chance to live."

"Nice attitude to have." Elliot pointed at the door.

"That is the most we've talked in 6 months. Maybe something good can come out of my screw ups, John. Maybe I haven't completely lost her."

"Oh, no. She's gone, Stabler. You cheated. It doesn't mean she wants you dead, but I don't know if she's going to take you back yet." Elliot shrugged. "Look, I'm not trying to be a downer, but she and your 8-year-old saw you lying in a pool of your own blood because she walked out when you cheated on her. Things don't magically get better." John shot Fin a dirty look. "Elliot, you're one of my boys. I'm not trying to make it bad for you. I'm trying to keep you grounded so you don't climb too high and fall again."

"You have a point." Elliot turned up the music a little and hummed along through a song that he and Fin both liked.

"This is torture!" John said. "Tell me there's something better than this to listen to!"

"Nothing's better than this, Munchie." Elliot and Fin laughed and sang louder through the next song on Liv's iPod. It shuffled to another old song that brought them all back to good times. It was another one of Olivia's favorites, and the men all knew it by heart after hearing it for nearly 10 years.

"What's the name of this song?" Munch asked. Elliot looked at Fin and they laughed.

"Its called Give A Little Bit. Notice how he repeats the phrase over and over in the song?" John scratched his nose with his middle finger pointing toward his two friends. "Olivia listened to this song all the time. Made me want to take up the guitar! When she was pregnant, about 3 weeks before Allie was born, she was in the kitchen with headphones, singing this song, really loud," Elliot said, laughing. "She thought I'd left for work already, but I'd called in, she'd thought she'd had contractions the night before, and I didn't want to leave her home alone just then."

"I remember that. You missed a lot of work, my friend."

"Anyway, she was singing, dancing around the kitchen in this pair of maternity pajamas; they were purple with cows on them. Looked like they were jumping over the moon! Horrible PJ's! I think she burned them after she had Allie. But she was dancing, singing, and I snuck up behind her, and when she turned around, and saw me there, dancing, I thought she was going to kill me!" John and Fin laughed. "I unplugged the headphones and put her CD in the player, and danced with her, and sang, off key, and probably saved my life."

"Sounds like you had a lot of fun with her," Fin said. The song changed again to something more mellow.

"You love her?"

"More than anything."

"Then make it right. Make things right with Kathy and with Liv. Make things right between the two of them. You didn't just take awaythe trust Liv had in you, Man," Munch told him. "You took away two of her friends; you and Kathy."

"I didn't even think about that."

"Elliot, when I was 13, my father commited suicide," John said very softly. Fin turned off the iPod to give John his full attention. "Its just these recent years that I can talk about it with anyone. I don't think I told Alex until you tried. Don't put me through that again, Stabler," he said in a very serious tone. "I couldn't go through burying someone who didn't want to live."

"Munch...It was the lowest I'd ever been. I'm on pills now for that, and I'm getting help. Okay?"

"Look me in the eye and tell me you want to live." Elliot's eyes met his friends.

"I want to live." John nodded and coughed, forcing tears back. He wasn't going to cry here, not now. And he was successful in drying his eyes without alerting anyone he was close to crying. "I will live, and I feel like an idiot for doin' what I did."

"Olivia will forgive you," Fin said.

"When?" Elliot sighed. "What will fix my marriage?" he asked, not hearing his wife coming in. "I need Olivia to trust me again, but I don't know how to do that. I would give anything-"

"Time," she answered. "Time is what I need, El." She said standing at the kitchen door with a bag of groceries. "Dinner in 45 minutes."

* * *

It had been three months since Olivia signed the lease. Either resign, or move out. She didn't know what to do. She wasn't ready to go home, but signing another lease would hurt Elliot's recovery. She shook that from her head. His attempted suicide wasn't to be part of her descision. He didn't want that to factor in to her coming home at all. If she came home, it needed to be because she wanted to be with him. Allie was settling in nicely at her new school, and going home would up-root her again. Eli didn't want to leave Don and Casey, ever. He loved having a 'little brother.' to play with. Don loved having Eli there, so did Casey. 

"Mom," Allie called from the front of the apartment. "Daddy's here," she yelled. She opened the door and flung herself into Elliot's arms. "Hi Dad."

"Hi Monkey."

"Hey, El."

"Liv," he said. He kissed her cheek. "Alex is picking her up for the slumber party so we can talk, right?" Liv nodded and stepped back into the kitchem. "Smells wonderful! What is it?"

"Pizza," she said, smirking at him. "I found a recipe online for organic homemade pizza, and I thought it would be good to try."

"You have to teach me how to cook, Olivia," he said, smelling the air near the oven.

"Hey Dad!"

"What?"

"We've been here three months and you haven't seen my room yet!" Elliot laughed and followed Allie up the stairs. Every the tom-boy, Allie's backwards hat had a video game character on it. The girl pulled it off, and hung it on the bedpost.

"Its totally not what I expected," he said, smiling. "I love it. That's it, we're redecorating our place when you get home. You pick the new stuff." Allie smiled. "Its beautiful, Allison." Her deep brown eyes sparkled. "I expected Nintendo beadspread like yours at home."

"Eh, I liked this one better." Elliot kissed her forehead. "You really like it, Dad?"

"I love it! Can I live in here, too?" Allie giggled and put on her hat when they heard a knock on the door. She climbed up onto the banister and slid down the spiral. Her feet hit the ground and she was running. Elliot looked over the railing to see Hannah at the door. "Have fun, Monkey!"

"Bye sweetie!" Olivia called.

"Bye Mom, bye Dad!" The door slammed and the apartment was silent. Elliot made his way down the stairs slowly.

"Liv?"

"Hmm?" Elliot stepped into the kitchan and watched her making salad. "Need something?"

"Olivia," he said gently. "I can't begin to tell you how much I regret what happened." She put the knife down that she was using to cut tomatoes. "I'm sorry I went over there, I'm sorry that I kissed Kathy, I'm sorry I tried to kill myself." Olivia turned to face him. "What's it gonna take for you to forgive me, Liv?"

"I need you to promise me that you will give everything that you are to me. I need to know that I'm the only woman you love, the only one you think about at night. I need to know that I wasn't your second choice, Elliot." He swallowed hard and put his arms around her.

"You aren't my second choice. I just met you later is all."

"It feels like if you can't be with Kathy, you'll settle for me-"

"As I recall, I had to pretty much beg you to go out with me, and when you did finally, its because we were raising your four-month-old together. Olivia, if I had met you before I met Kathy, It would have been _you_ that I married. There wouldn't have been a second wife because I wouldn't have ever left you," he said. "Every second I live, I will fight for you, to the death if I had to, to show you how much I love you, Olivia. I'd sell my soul right here, right now, if that's what it would take to get you back into my life." Olivia settled further into his arms and choked out a sob. "Come home."

"I'm not ready, Elliot." He seemed to deflate in her arms. "We need to take things slowly, Love." Elliot took a step back, brought his hands up to her neck and gently tilted her chin up to kiss her. She leaned up and they're lips met.

"I love you," he whispered. "I love you, Liv."

"I know."

"And If I could go back 30 years and meet you first, I would."

"Elliot, I had a perfect life the last 9 years with you. I'm almost 47 years old, and I'm too old to start over-"

"Then I'm pretty screwed."

"You aren't-"

"You're 46, means I'll be 50 soon." Liv chuckled. "What?"

"Don wasn't 50 when we started working together." Elliot's eyes started to bug out. "He was my age."

"That is...less than comforting." Olivia pushed away from her husband and checked on the pizza. Satisfied it was ready, she pulled it from the oven and set it on the stove. He stood behind her and hugged Olivia back into his chest. When she didn't relax, he released her. "Sorry."

"Slow, remember?"

"Slow. How slow?"

"We'll see. Its going to take time for me to trust you again, El," she said, cutting the pizza.

"Trust me not to cheat, or trust me enough to not tell Allie to count the knives." She glared at him. "I need to know exactly where I stand with you, Benson," he shot out.

"Here's where you stand," she said facing him. "Our 8-year-old saw you in a puddle of your own blood because we moved out. She wakes up every night, crying, scared you're dead. I didn't ask her to count the knives. She did that on her own because she saw you in our kitchen. EVERY time she comes back from visiting you, she wakes up at night from wetting her bed, and having nightmares. She's in more therapy than you are, Elliot. I can get over what happened with you and Kathy. I've dealt with it. I'm not ready to put Allie back in that apartment every day where there is still a faint blood stain. I won't do that to her." She turned back to the pizza. "Don't ask me to choose between you and hurting her. She'll win every time."

"That's how it should be, Liv."

"So," she said, gently. "Hungry? Or did that kill your appitite."

"I'd still like to have dinner with you," he said shyly. "If you'll have me."

"Sure."

"Thank you," he whispered as he kissed her forehead.

"For what?"

"Letting me into your life again."

* * *


	8. Chapter 8

Here ya go!

* * *

Olivia opened her eyes, expecting to hear Allie in her loft playing. Silence greeted her as the sun filtered in through the drapes. She remembered that Allie was at a slumber party and - 

"Shit!" she muttered, turning to see Elliot asleep at her side. The rest of the night hit her head on. Dinner had gone well, and so they sat on the couch and talked for a few hours. They had a few glasses of wine, and he'd kissed her. She felt like she was dating again. Oliviia felt young. She snuggled back into his chest and chuckled.

"Liv?" Elliot called in a sleepy tone.

"Morning," she said, sliding up and kissing his cheek.

"You work today?"

"Nope. Its Sunday." Olivia's cell phone and pager started blaring. "Its Fin on my cell, Don on the pager," she said. "Stabler."

"_Liv, we can't find him_."

"Which him?"

"_Elliot. He didn't make it home_-"

"He's with me. We had a little wine last night and he stayed over."

"_Cragen's headed over there now to check on him, and Casey's called his cell phone 14 times_." Liv chuckled. "_Its not funny, Liv_."

"Yeah it is. He's fine. Thanks for the concern," Liv said, sincerly. Elliot walked into the livingroom to find his pants and cell phone. He stood at the door and held up his phone. There were 26 missed calls, and 13 texts. "Call Don before-" Her words were cut off when they heard keys in the door. Elliot was still naked in the living room, and had only seconds to pull a pillow to hide important areas.

"LIV? Olivia- Elliot?" Don stopped, surprised to see Elliot. He turned away. "I'll guard the front..." Elliot picked up his pants and walked side ways into the bedroom.

"We'll be right with you, Don." The door shut.

"This is the kind of stunt I would have expected from you two back in the days of the 1-6!" Don called over his shoulder. Olivia could be heard laughing from the other side of the bedroom door. A few minutes later, the couple stepped out. "If I was still your captain, I'd have knocked you on your goddamn ass for this one, Stabler." The two sat on the couch, awaiting the ass-chewing that they knew was coming from the old man.

"What'd I do now?"

"You didn't get back when you told Fin you'd be there. Part of you not being in a psych ward right now is that we all, as a group know where you are at all times. Two and a half months ago, you slit your wrists, Elliot!" Don paced the living room. "I'm too old to deal with this shit, Stabler." Don sat and stared at the two. "You forgive him yet?"

"We're working on it."

"Elijah is doing great with us," Don said, smiling. "Sees Rebecca once a week. He's a happy kid."

"Still won't see me," Liv said.

"When you and Allie left, it cut him deep. Deeper than Casey and Ronny. Elijah is much more emotional than Ronny, and he's older. He understands that you two were fighting, his mother left him, then his father, and a weekend with Grandpa has turned into 3 months. I enrolled him in school and he's doing well. If you are going to take him back home soon, you need to give him notice and a choice."

"I'm not going home yet, but Eli needs to be with one of us-"

"I'm not leaving the kid with him until Rebecca clears him completely." Elliot scoffed and leaned back into the couch. "I need 100 percent guarentee that he is safe before I send him away. He lives with you and Allie, or me."

"Sounds fair," Liv said. "I'll pick him up today-"

"He needs time, Liv. I'll have him ready on Friday when you get off work. I suggest you bring him here a few hours today, and again on Wednesday." Don rubbed his forehead. "Sometimes I think we're all so co-dependant that the whole lot of us should live in one house." Elliot laughed lightly.

"Would John Stamos live in our attic?"

"Very funny, Groucho."

"Don," Liv said, calling attention to her side of the couch. "Thank you for taking Eli for as long as you did. With everything I'm going through with Allison, he'd have been lost in all of it."

"Why do you think I didn't bring him back to you that first night after Elliot's little stunt?" He sighed. "He needed to be the star for a while, the oldest, and he needed two parents. Between suicide watch on Elliot, getting Allie taken care of after seeing him nearly dead, and working as much as you have been, Elijah would have been completely forgotten about by both of you. Now get your acts together and be parents." Don stood to leave.

"Don-?"

"Olivia," he said, turning from the door. "Sending him home to you feels like losing another child. I'm not his father, and its not up to me where he goes, but don't take him away from me completely."

"Wouldn't dream of it, Dad," she said. Don smiled sadly and left.

* * *

"Why do I have to go, Grandpa?" Eli asked, eyes pooling with tears. "You don't want me either?" 

"Elijah, I would love for you to stay here with me, but your Mommy and Daddy miss you so much!" Don roughed the boy's light brown hair as he chewed on his bottom lip. Don smiled; he looked like Olivia when he did that. "What if I came to pick you up from school in the afternoons like I used to?"

"You do that anyway," he said, sounding more like his father this time around.

"Eli, I've been the one who's taken care of you from the time you were a year old. That's five whole years where it was me and you. Allie went to daycare because she didn't want to be here with the boys, but you have always been my little detective. I love you, and I'll be here when ever you need me," Don whispered seeing Elliot's truck coming up the driveway. "Now, I need you to be good for your mom and dad. Okay?"

"I don't want to go," he cried, holding onto Don's neck. "Don't make me, Grandpa!"

"Eli, we talked about this all week. You'll come back in a few hours. This is just dinner and a movie with your parents." Elijah gripped tightly to the man's neck. "I brought you there all week, and we talked about you going with them alone now."

"Daddy and mommy will leave and forget about me again," he cried. The boy was shaking.

"You have to give them a chance, Elijah Paul. They love you, and they aren't going to forget about you."

"Eli?" Elliot called, coming in. Don had given them keys so they could come and go as the please with Eli there, in an effort to show Elijah that he trusted them. "Son, we need to go, or we'll miss the move. Allie and your mom are in the car."

"I don't wanna go!" Eli screamed. Don pulled himself loose from the little boy's grip. "Please Grandpa! Don't make me leave! I'll be good!"

"Elijah Paul Stabler," Don said in a stern voice. Eli stopped crying and stared up at Don. "I love you, and I will be here when you get back in 4 hours. Now, your Mom and Dad are doing everything they can to make you feel safe and loved, even when that means sending you to live with me. They will not hurt you, they will not forget about you, and they will not leave you. If they do, its my office." Eli smirked. He knew it was bad to get pulled into the office. He was still Captain Cragen in that office. Even Elliot hated the sound of the office. "Now," he said kneeling down. "Have fun."

"Bye Grandpa," Eli said, hugging Don. He sighed and wiped his cheeks dry.

"Go have fun, my little Detective." Elliot lifted his son up. Eli stared at his father for a minute.

"I missed you, Eli."

"Hi dad."

"You got taller."

"Can Grandpa Don come, too?"

"Not this time, Eli. But we'll be back." Eli looked down. "I missed you so much, buddy," Elliot whispered, hugging the boy tightly.

"Missed you, too, Daddy." Eli finally hugged his dad back.

"So, your Mom and sister are in the truck, waiting for us. Wanna go see a movie while Mommy cooks some dinner?" Elijah nodded. "Mom learned to cook some really cool stuff. Tonight she's making stuffed Manicotti, and fresh snap beans. She cuts all the veggies herself! We even grew the snap beans!"

"Cool!"

"Ever heard of organic foods?" Eli shook his head. "Mommy'll tell you about it in the car." Don watched the two leave. Casey came in from the back yard with Ronny on her hip, both covered in sand.

"Is he okay?"

"Yeah," Don said.

"Are you okay?"

"He was with me as much as Ronny, and I hate to send him home when he's still scared. I know its only a few hours, and its best for him to build trust by being with them, but I can't help but not want to let go." Casey kissed his cheek and handed Ronny off.

"He'll be back tonight," Casey reminded him.

* * *

"You sure about this, Liv?" Elliot asked, looking the house over. It had been a month since he'd spent the night with Olivia that first time, and now stayed regularly with his wife and daughter. Eli would only leave with Elliot and Olivia if he knew he'd go back to Don at night, and would cry when his parents picked him up. AIt was hurting all of them, including Don and Casey. But Olivia, being the creative one in their family, had found a solution, and jumped on it when the opperatunity allowed. The house behind Don's went up for sale, and she wanted it. 

"Positive."

"This is going to make things better between us?"

"Allie is not going back into that apartment. Even with new carpet, she freaks. They'll have a yard, and we can take down the back fence to Don's yard."

"He wasn't serious y'know," Elliot called over his shoulder while Liv went back into the kitchen to check on the lasagna she was cooking.

"Not serious?"

"About one house-"

"Its not one house, Elliot. Its two. The kids need a safe place to play, and Elijah refuses to come home. I made him come up, and he wet his pants. I can't do this to him." She set the dinner on the table. "ALLIE!" she hollered up. Running was heard, silence, then the familier thud of sneakers hitting the floor after sliding down the banister.

"Who's house?"

"Maybe ours."

"Would Dad and Eli live there?" Liv nodded. "Where is it?"

"Turn the page and look at the other pictures."

"That's funny!"

"What?"

"That looks like Grandpa Don's house from the back." Olivia grinned and nodded. "Its Grandpa Don's house? Sweet! But that's in Queens. Will I have to change schools again?"

"Well, yeah, but we'd move in around Christmas, That's another 2 months away." Allison considered it for a while. "We're going to move out of this apartment no matter what we do, its either another apartment, or we can get a house."

"Why?"

"Well, your dad and I are getting back together, honey." Allie smiled. "And, well, this place is too small for all of us. Don't you want to live behind Grandpa Don?" Allie nodded.

"Great," Elliot said, kissing her head.

"Mom, when you and dad are back together, is it for good, or will we move out again?" Allie asked in a small voice.

"Its for good, Allie," Elliot said, squeezing her hand. "And Mom is going to stay home and spend the afternoon with you and Elijah now."

"Really?"

"Yep," Liv answered. "I've worked as a police officer enough to get something called a pension, and that will help us so I can be at home when you get home from school." In reality, afterschool care from three to occasionally midnight was far too expensive for two children, and Eli needed her more now than ever. "We move in two months."

"Is everything approved?"

"Yep."

"How'd you get the money together?"

"Remember when our apartment went co-op when Allie was 5?" Elliot nodded. "Its more than tripled in value, and I have 18 offers on it."

"That many?"

"That many."

"We're moving?"

"We're moving."

"I am not mowing the lawn," Elliot said flatly.

* * *

The house was filling up quickly with furniture. With the sale of their apartment, they were able to move in a week before Christmas. Elliot had opted to keep the fence up, as Don's side had roses that would suffer. Instead, the took out a small section and put a door in the gate for the kids to run back and forth. The snow on the ground made it a harder job than needed, but it was the only way they could get Eli, in all his stubdornness to live with his parents. 

Eli had yet to set foot inside the new house. He would play with Ron in the yard, but when Ronny went home, Eli did, too. Eli felt safe with Casey and Don. Olivia was still mentally kicking herself for not taking both kids when she walked out 6 months earlier. She asked if he wanted to stay or go, and he wanted to stay with Elliot, so she let him. But then when Elliot left him at Don's and didn't see Eli for a month, it hurt the boy badly.

"Elijah," Don called into the yard. Eli ran through the snow.

"Hi Grandpa!"

"You need to go into your parent's house and see what they have for you," he said, with a half smile.

"Its not Christmas," he whined. "You said I could stay 'til Christmas."

"And you can, but you need to go and look at what they have for you, kid." Eli held up his hand for Don to take. "You're going solo on this case, little Detective." Eli sighed. "I'll give you a clue. Space, the final frontier." Eli's eyes lit up and he ran through the snow to his parents' house.

"Momma!" he hollered running through the sliding door. He pulled his boots off and tossed his coat on the floor.

"Whoa, slow down," Elliot said, lifting his son up.

"Grandpa said you gots a surprise for me," Eli said, grinning. Elliot carried the boy back to his bedroom. When he opened the door, Eli stared a full minute before wiggling down. "Daddy! That's so cool!" The room had been painted dark navy, almost black, and had planets hanging from the ceiling. Dickie's old bunk bed was painted to match, complete with glow-in-the-dark stars on ever inch of the wall and bed.

"You like it?"

"Its cool, Daddy!"

"How'd you like to live here." The boy tensed. "You and Ronny can spend the night here if you like."

"And Grandpa?"

"Come look out this window," Elliot instructed, putting Eli down. The small back yards could be seen from his window, and Don was standing out on the porch near the pool. "See? He's right there. You can see into the kitchen and living room right from your bed."

"I guess its okay to spend the night here."

"You guess?" Elliot teased. "Okay, kid. I made lunch."

"You made lunch? Not Mommy?"

"Hey, I can make stuff."

"Not like Mommy," Eli said, giving Elliot a look that reminded him of Liv in every way.

"Go eat, and we'll see if you like it, ya little monster." Eli made a face at his dad and ran off down the hall. As he slid into a chair at the talbe, he turned his head to look out the window, to make sure Don was still there. When he was satisfied that he wasn't going anywhere, he ate his sandwich. When he looked up a second time Ronny and Don had gone inside.

"Daddy-"

"Grandpa probably needed to put Ronny down for a nap. He'll be over to see you in an hour or two. Okay?" Eli nodded and pushed the plate away. He climbed down and went up onto the couch and stared out the window. Olivia looked at Elliot who shrugged. Eli sniggled and stared.

"Momma?" he called softly. Olivia was at the couch the second the word was out. "Do I really have to live here after Christmas?"

"Yes, sweetie. You do."

"Can I still play with Grandpa Don and Ronny whenever I want?"

"For the most part, yes. But there will be times where they need to be a family without us, and we'll need to be a family without them."

"Are we a family again?"

"We were always a family, Elijah."

"No," he pouted. "You left, and Allie left, and Daddy left. Families don't leave."

"We came back," she said. "We made sure you were safe and happy."

"We were a broken family," Elliot said. "Mommy fixed us. We're good now, son." Eli sighed and watched out the window a while longer.

* * *


	9. Chapter 9

Christmas morning came, and the Stabler house was full; Maureen and Luke took over the living room, Lizzie was on the top bunk in Allie's room, while Dickie and Alexander completely took over Elijah's room. Kathleen and Rose stayed in the guest room where they could maintain privacy, and Don had Eli at his house for one last night. Eli would stay the night at his house only when Ronny was there, which had become the regular Monday, Wednesday, and Friday routine. But the night before was his last night as a Cragen wanna-be. Elliot and Olivia had a little plan to help ease the transition.

Olivia looked at the table full of food that she and Maureen had cooked early that morning. John would be there soon with his family, as would Fin. Don and Casey were already over with Eli and Ronny, both of whom were trying to open gifts before everyone was up.

"Old times," Maureen said, smiling at Liv.

"Pretty close."

"Remember our first Christmas?" Liv groaned and rolled her eyes.

"I remember I worked all night and fell asleep half way through you guys opening gifts." Maureen laughed. "It seems so long ago. Allie was so little."

"She's still so little!"

"No, not really."

"She's too young to be anyone's Aunt," Maureen said, eyeing Olivia. Liv went about cooking for another minute before it registered what Maureen has said. "Don't tell daddy yet."

"Oh my God! Really?" Maureen nodded and Olivia hugged the woman. "You are So on desk duty," Liv teased.

"It must be your desk, because I'm the first in the squad to get pregnant since you."

"Good luck getting off the desk, Maureen."

"What if we don't tell dad?"

"Maur, you're 30, married for nearly a year, and you work 20 feet away from him. Why would you not want to tell him?"

"The idea of admitting to him that I have sex makes me queezy." Olivia laughed. The two put the last of the chocolate chip pancakes on the plate and set them on the table just as John, Alex, Hannah and Hope came through the front door, followed closely by Fin and his girlfriend.

"Hi Gramma Livvie!" Alexander said, throwing his arms around Liv's legs. His big brown eyes danced as he looked up at her.

"Go call the troops in for food, kiddo." Alex was off, yelling through the house that breakfast was ready. People came from every direction and soon, the table was packed. "First off," Liv said quietting the table. "Its been insane this last year. I don't know if we'd have made it through without you guys. Thank you for pulling us back together when we fell apart." Elliot took her hand as she sat down. Everyone looked at each other. In that short speech, Liv said everything that they'd all been feeling since the beginning of the summer. In the silence, they all thanked each other with glances across the table. "Dig in!"

* * *

As the dishes were cleared away an hour later, the kids gathered around the tree. Everyone was well-fed, and happy. Elliot decided to play Santa and hand out gifts to everyone. As soon as everyone had a present, they all opened their first gift. After that, he handed them out, one at a time. Hope was a little uncomfortable, as she'd never had Christmas before, and they'd just had Hannukah. No one had ever given her so much stuff. After an hour or so, the tree was empty below and there was wrapping paper up to Elliot's ears. Ronny and Eli were playing with the toys they got, while Allie and Hope were compairing iPods. Hannah and Lizzie were chatting about school and Elliot and Don disappeaered through the back. Olivia grinned, knowing where they were going.

"Santa missed the chimney with this one," Elliot said, coming back in with Don behind him. "He missed the chimney and it landed in the garage next door."

"Hmm," Liv said. "Who's it for?"

"I think its for Eli." Elijah popped his head up from the pile of toys.

"Me?"

"That's what the tag says...Daddy, Mommy, Eli and Allie. Its for all of us." The two kids came running to their dad, who held a puppy in his arms. "Kids, meet Rookie."

"Daddy, he's so pretty!" Allie said, petting the Golden Retriever's head.

"He's for all of us?"

"Yep, so that means we all have to take care of him, and we all have to live here to help take care of him." Eli thought about it. He'd been begging for a dog for so long. "How do you feel about that, tall man?"

"Can I still spend the night with Ronny at Grandpa Don's house sometimes?"

"Yep."

"Can Ronny still come over here?"

"Of course."

"I guess I can live here. Its not so far to Gandpa Don's house."

"Eight seconds if you run," Lizzie said.

"Hey," Maureen called quieting the group. "There's one more little gift here." Everyone looked at her. "Daddy, this is for you." Elliot opened the box and pulled out a t-shirt.

"World's Greatest Grandpa. Thanks, sweetie!" Liv covered her mouth to hide the laughter as best she could. Elliot froze. The groups could see the wheels in his head turning. "Maureen? You and Luke?"

"Due in late July," Maureen said, resting a hand on her belly. Her father hugged her tightly and kissed her cheek.

"You're on restricted desk duty, sweet heart."

"Aw, man...more pregnant lady food runs," Fin mumbled. "I will NOT drive to Jersey for a hot dog you won't want by the time I get back like I did for Liv!"

"Yeah, ya will."

"Only 'cause your dad's my boss." A knock on the front door called attention away from the group. Liv stood to get it. When she came back into the room, Kathy was following her, blush creeping up her neck.

"Kathy-"

"I thought she should be with her kids for Christmas," Olivia told her husband and the family. Her tone was final, and no one was going to question it. "Come eat, we have a ton of food left, and a lot of gossip to catch up on.

* * *

As winter faded into spring, and spring faded into summer, the back doors between Stabler and Cragen were always open with Ronny and Eli running back and fourth with the dog, Rookie. The houses were all full as usual. A kid who lived next door to Maureen and Luke got creative with fireworks, and now the couple, and their new little daughter Jo Anna, lived with Olivia and Elliot.

Olivia was loving retirment; the kids were going better in school, and Eli stopped sneaking over to Don's house at night and sleeping on the porch swing. Elliot had been back at work about a year now, as he'd started back in August, just two months after his nearly fatal encounter with a knive. Fin was always with him at work, as was Maureen, Munch, and Maureen's various partners. But it wasn't until January that work was back to normal for him. He lived with Liv then, and Eli had started sleeping in his own room on a regular basis.

Casey and Don were both working, and Ronny spent his days running wild through the Stabler house. He was, as Liv said, "a very active" 5-year-old. He cut Allie's hair, which ended up needing to be cut almost as short as Eli's after that. She looked like a boy with the baseball shirts and Converse shoes. People often mistook her for a boy as well. At first, Allie got very upset and cried in the middle of dinner, getting her a free dessert. Now, however, she was used to it, and rarely let it bother her. As long as her room was Ivory, Pink and Sage done in roses, she was happy.

In fact, she'd used it to her advantage a few times at summer day-camp. Another child was teasing her, and she ran to the counselors in tears. She put on quite a show for them, and tearfully explained her uncle was 5 years old, and cut her hair while she slept, and how long and pretty it was before. She cried when she said how much she missed braids like the girls who were teasing her. Allie had extra ice cream after lunch.

Her relationship with Elliot was still damaged. Olivia was scared that they would never be as close as they once were.

Once school started, and Maureen moved out with her husband and daughter, the Stabler House was back to normal. The days were certainly quiet with Ronny in school (finally) and Olivia found herself missing the noise.

"El?"

"Mmm?" he moaned sleepily.

"What do you think about having another baby?"

"Your crazy," camed a muffled response.

"I only have time for one more, I'm pushing menopause."

"You're a grandma, Liv."

"Hey," she whined. "Forty-seven is Not old, Elliot Patrick Stabler."

"Yeah it is," he joked. "Go to sleep."

"Elliot, I'm serious." Elliot flipped the light on and sat to face his wife.

"Olivia, think back to when Allie and Elijah were babies-"

"Best years of my life." He gave her a look that was gentle, but told her not to interupt him. "Sorry. Go on."

"From the time Allie was born until she was five and Eli was three, you didn't sleep more than 2 hours at a stretch unless one of the older ones had them for the weekend," he reminded. "Eli wouldn't let go of you until he was almost two, and that's a LONG time to nurse a baby, wife of mine. Remember when Allie figured out how to oped the diaper thingie?" Liv groaned and laughed. "Smell stayed on the walls even _after_ we scrubbed it-" A splash from their window pulled Elliot from the conversation.

"Elliot, its 2:30. Don and Casey wouldn't be swimming right now-" Elliot was out of the bed as quickly as she'd spoken. Liv pulled on a robe and followed her husband.

"Liv, he's gone!" Elliot called from Eli's room. Olivia rand down the hall, through the open glass door and through the yard. She froze for a second, seeing her 7-year old struggling to staf afloat in the pool, and suddenly disappear under the water. Olivia dove for the boy, grabbing at whatever she could reach. It was too dark to see her son.

"What-" Don asked opening the door.

"Eli's in th pool!" Elliot yelled, running from the deck to turn on the lights. Don disappeared back into the house. As the lights flickered on, Liv could see her son, kicking, trying to go up. She grabbed his hand and pushed off from the bottom of the pool, and surfaced, Elijah in tow.

"Elliot, help me!" she called, kicking to the edge of the water. Elliot stepped onto the ladder and pulled his family in. "Elijah, sweetie?" Eli coughed and gasped, but he was breathing. Don came back out with Casey behing him, both carrying towels.

"We got a bus on its way." Don wrapped the boy in his favorite towel. "Elijah? Are you okay?" Eli gripped Don's neck and started crying.

"I forgot about the pool," he sobbed. "You didn't leave the light on and I couldn't see it." Elliot looked at Don.

"I left the light on in the pool so he could see it when he was still sneaking over, but I figured since he didn't do that anymore, I could shut it off. Hasn't been here since his birthday..."

"Eli," Casey said, putting a smaller towel to his forhead. "Olivia, he smacked his head."

"I fell over my swim jacket that I left out to dry and hit my head on the ladder. I stood up, and I got dizzy." Eli yawned and shivvered.

"Let's get him inside before he freezes," Don suggested.

"I'll go stay with Allie so you can go to the hospital with your son."

"NO!" Eli whined. "I want you and Grandpa Don!"

"I have to stay with Ronny," Don told the boy as he carried him in. Eli started to cry, and hugged Don so tight that the man gagged. "Eli," he coughed. "Elijah, you parents need to be there. okay?" Don set him on the kitchen counter and flipped on all the lights.

"Daddy?" Ronny called from the hallway. "What's going down?"

"Fin babysitting again?"

"Eli fell and bumped his head. Elliot and Liv are going to take him to the hospital, Red," Casey said, lifting the boy up. "He'll be fine." Ronny nodded and yawned. "I'm going to take him with me up to stay with Allie." Liv nodded and loked at her son's head.

"That's going to leave a cool scar, Stabler," Liv told her son. He sniffled and focused his blue eyes on Don. "Just like Mommy's. Grandpa doesn't have a cool scar."

"Olivia Michele-"

"Actually, I changed it to Olivia Dawn when you 'adopted' me," she said over her shoulder, still cleaning her son's wound. Don stopped for a moment.

"It was Lizzie's idea." Before Elliot could tell his little story, paramedics were knocking on the door.

* * *

The hospital waiting room hadn't changed in the last year, Olivia noticed. The same magazine Maureen had flipped through a year earlier while Elliot was being worked on was still there, although it wasn't in as good condition. Eli had opted for Don to go back with him, but he wasn't allowed, as he wasn't next of kin. Elliot stepped up and went back to hold his son while they checked his lungs and put stitches in his head.

"So, how was this Lizzie's idea for you to take my name?" Olivia laughed lightly and looked down at her hands.

"Elliot told the kids that when I adopted them, they could take new middle names if they wanted, since they didn't want to have anything to do with Kathy. Elliot rattled off names from my family, and Lizzie asked about the rape. Kathy told her about my mom's case." Don sighed. "When he got to the part about my lack of father, Elizabeth, in her infinite wisdom, suggest that Munch adopt me." Don chuckled. "And it dawned on Elliot that you were more of a father-figure to me than he was to his own kids at times."

"No argument from me," Don said.

"So, he asked if they thought it was a good idea. Apparently, Maureen thought it was perfect, Kathleen thought it was romantic as hell, Dickie was 'cool with it,' and Lizzie suggested that I take Dawn as my middle name, since all of them were changing their middle names."

"When did you find out about it?"

"At the party."

"But Liz changed her name to Elizabeth Dawn."

"Elliot told her that she could suggest it to me, it had to be my descision, so she picked the name in hopes that it would help me accept you as my dad." Don shifted his weight in his chair a little uncomfortably. "Anyway..."

"So, he's taken to sneaking back over."

"Yeah. I don't know what to do. He and I never really bonded. He took to Kathy better than me."

"That's not true. He's a Stabler. Its in his gene pool to adore you, Benson." Liv smiled and looked down again. "Anything going on at school?"

"No, his teacher said he's doing okay. Not terrific, but not bad."

"Last year, he was well ahead of his whole class, Liv. He's a brilliant kid. Maybe being so close was a bad idea." Olivia's head shot up. "He sneaks over at night, introduces Ron as his little brother, won't go anywhere with out me or Casey there half the time."

"He still watches your yard from his bed or he won't sleep."

"Olivia, he needs to talk to someone."

"I think we all do after the year we had."

"Damn straight."

"Look Grandpa!!" Eli's voice rang. "Dr. Herbert gave me a green sucker AND a red one!"

"Cool."

"I asked for the green one for you. He said I could only have it if I was really still while he put stitches in," Eli bragged. "I was really really still. He said I was the best patient he's ever had."

"Very Cool, Mini-Stabler."

"Grandpa?"

"What?"

"Mom changed her name to Olivia Dawn after you, right?" Don nodded. "Can I change my name to Elijah Cragen Stabler? Don is already taken by everyone else." Don looked to the boys parents for help with the answer. Olivia smiled and nodded.

"I think that would be a great idea, Little man," Elliot said, taking his son. "Everyone should be named after someone they love in our family."

"What about Allie?"

"Well, son, Allie isn't ready to make that choice yet. When she is, she'll tell us."

"No," Liv said looked at the boy. "There are rules that you have to follow, kid. You want to take Grandpa's name, you have to be more respectful to his home. You can't show up at 2:30 in the morning to sleep on his back porch. Its rude."

"I'm sorry Grandpa Don!"

"When you have a bad dream, or when you get scared, you can tell me or Daddy. Got it?" Eli nodded. "Just like Grandpa don, we can help you to feel safe again, Eli."

"How?"

"Here's how...Elliot you wanna take over?" Elliot shot Liv a look, but Don took over before he had time to panic.

"I have a case for you." Elijah listened carefully. "You have a dog who needs, a mom, dad, and sister who all need you a lot more than I do."

"You don't need me anymore?"

"I need your friendship, I need your quick-witted jokes, but your mom and dad need you to hug them good-night, and sleep in your bed where you won't fall in my pool and get hurt, and they need you to love them. Okay?" Eli nodded. "Now, you can come over to my house no earlier than 8:00am, and no later than 8:00pm unless you are spending the night, or its a really emergency. All right?" Eli nodded sadly. "Good. If that's settled, you can borrow my last name and make it your middle name."

"Thanks, Grandpa."

"Thank them," Don said, tilting his head in Olivia and Elliot's direction. Eli hugged his dad tightly.

"Love you, buddy."

"You too, Dad."

"We need to make sure your sister hasn't driven Casey nuts." Don lead them from the hospital to his car.

* * *

Sorry about the wait, Y'all! Had an interesting week, and no time to write. On that note, my 24th birthday was AWSOME!!! 


	10. Chapter 10

Sorry for the wait! I hope you like this next chapter, folks. And thanks for all the wonderful reviews!!! They make my day!!!

* * *

John paced through the hall nervously. Hope was lying down in her shared room with Hannah because she had a headache after yet another fight at school sent her into the emergency room. Hope had started to give him an ulcer. For the last year, it had been a series of two steps forward, one step back with the girl. It had taken months just to gain her trust enough to be able to check on her at night without her getting upset. She refused to tell them why she was so worried at night, and John didn't push. While he didn't know the details, he knew that she'd been through the ringer as much as Hannah had. 

Hannah was much easier to deal with at that age, though.

Hannah, being extremely intellegent, was able to cope with the new surroundings with therapy. She grew and changed, and learned to accept love from those around her without assuming they would hurt her. Hannah placed below average in placement, but had blown the test out of the water with I.Q. She was the smartest child Munch had ever met.

And Hope was a close second

Hope was, however, angry, and very defensive. She was getting in fights at school, at the park, and just about everywhere she went. Today's fight wasn't exactly her fault. The 11-year-old was beaten down by a group of 15 and 16 year old girls who decided that the girl was a good target. Because of Hope's age, the squad declared it an SVU case and Stabler squared, Fin and Casey would have a feild day with it in court. Something about beating a 11-year-old child of a cop wouldn't sit well with Judge Petrovsky.

John was worried that Hope was more emotionally damaged than she let on. A crash tore him from his thoughts.

"PAPA!" Hannah yelled as John made his way down the hall quickly. He flung open the door to see Hannah and Hope on the floor. Hope was covering her eyes and crying.

"Hannah, what happened to your sister?" John knelt by the girls.

"My eyes," Hope screamed. John uncovered her eyes to see they were completely red. All the white was bloody. "I can't see, Papa," she said, shaking.

"Let's get her into the kitchen. Its too bright in here." Hannah lifted the small girl with ease and carried her sister into the kitchen and set her on the counter.

"John?"

"Alex, we need to get her back to the hospital." John placed a cool damp rag over her eyes. "Keep it dark. Alex, go get us a cab and have him wait for us. We'll meet you down stairs in a few minutes." Alex took the keys and left the apartment quickly. It amazed her how calm and collected her husband was. "Hannah, what happened?"

"She said her head was really hurting, like there was a drill going into her eyes. She stood up to turn the light off, and fell over." John nodded as he wrapped Hope's eyes with another layer of dish towels.

"Can you carry her all the way down?" Hannah nodded and lifted her sister up. They locked the door and hurried to the elevator. "Hope? How are your eyes?"

"They burn, but not as bad as when the lights were on." Hope sniffled and help tightly to the rags over her eyes. She helt her sister slide her into the car, and buckle the seat belt over her lap.

"Bellevue and step on it. Its an emergency," John said, closing the door. The cabbie nodded, seeing the blood seeping through the rags over the child's eyes.

* * *

Again, the whole group found themselves pacing a waiting room at Bellevue. It felt like they spent more time meeting there than at work, or Sunday dinner. Thankfully, Kathy was a nurse in that particular hospital, and knew most of the pediatric doctors. Even though she worked in NICU, she was able to get in and stay with Hope. When she was brought into surgery, Kathy went to the waiting room to relay news. 

"She took a hard hit to the back of her head," Kathy informed them.

"Not news. She was jumped outside our building this afternoon."

"Well, the X-rays they took earlier showed minor bleeding, but passed it off as just the swelling."

"Those idiots missed it?"

"Even if they had seen it, it was so fast that there is nothing they could have done, John. At least she's going to live. If you hadn't gotten her here so fast, she probably would have died during the night."

"I gotta sit down." John dropped back into the chair behind him, next to Alex, Casey and Liv.

"She's in surgery right now," Kathy told the group. "But her doctors are just going in to stop the bleeding. She's going to be blind. There is nothing they can do for her in that department." Hannah stood and left.

"Hannah-"

"Hope's birthday is next week, with mine, and I need to get her a gift. Early would be better this year, Papa. I'll be back in a few hours." Before anyone could stop the 16-year-old, she was off.

"Hannah never ceases to amaze me, John," Elliot said, resting a hand on his friend's shoulder.

"Good young lady," John choked out.

"Oh, John, she'll get through this," Alex soothed. "Hell, with an extended family like this, she may not know the difference."

"We were supposed to make the kid's life easier. I wanted to give her a better life, and now she'd blind," John said flattly.

"But she has a sister who loves her, two parents who do everything they can to give her a better life, and this family. I think this family is closer than my Mormon family back home," Casey reminded him. "Liv pulled me back when I was broken. You and Fin pulled Elliot back from Crazy when he was ready to die. We pulled together to help you adopt the girls, and you helped all of us together when Elliot and Olivia weren't speaking."

"I get it; we're family."

"John-"

"I need some air." John left the waiting room and stepped outside.

"I'll be back," Olivia said, taking her cell phone and grabbing Kathy's hand. "Come on."

"Where are we going?"

* * *

"Dr. Wilson," he muttered into the phone at 9:00 at night. James Wilson was used to the unexpected. Getting calls while he was actually _with _Greg House eating dinner on the House couch, was one that he wasn't always prepared for. 

"_Jimmy, its Olivia Stabler_."

"Olivia? Is Allie okay?" Allison House furrowed her brow, but Greg ushered her and the kids into the next room.

"Spawn of Wilson. Don't ask, and Don't tell."

"_Allie is fine. Going to be ten in March_."

"Wow."

_"Listen, my friend's 11-year-old daughter is hurt, and I need Dr. House. Can you give me his number_?"

"Better." James handed the phone off. "Greg, its for you."

* * *

Kathy had relayed all of Hope's chart to Greg, along with every detail she knew. House scoffed and said that he was a diagnostician, and that job was done. The doctors had made all the right choices, and there wasn't anything he could do. Deal with it, and buy a dog. Kathy hung the phone up and glared at Liv. 

"He's an ass," Kathy said.

"But is he right?"

"Yeah. Nothing he could do. If she'd gone to him instead of Bellevue, he might have been able to stop this before it happened, but the damage was done, and 'deal with it and buy a dog' were his exact words. Who is Jimmy?" Liv blushed. "Jimmy...as in Allie's...?" Olivia nodded.

"Jewish oncologist."

"Nice."

"He's gay, and walked out on at least one kid."

"Men."

"Scum?"

"Scum." Kathy laughed with Liv. "Olivia?"

"Hmm?"

"I can't tell you how sorry I am about what happened. I should have had more control."

"Yeah." Kathy cast her eyes away. "Its in the past, Kathy. Okay? Elliot and I have been back together almost a years now. Everything's forgiven."

"Let's head on back to the waiting room."

* * *

"Hope?" 

"Hi Hannah," the young girl said softly.

"Brought you an early birthday present. Its going to give Papa a corenary," Hannah told her little syster, who's eyes were still wrapped.

"How stupid does this look?"

"Gives you an interesting hair do, but you don't look stupid, kid. Want your present?"

"I guess." Hope put her hands out, and reeled back when she felt something large and furry jump up. "Did you sneak Rookie in her!?"

"Nope. This isn't Rookie. This is Mollie. She's a pure-blood Golden Retriever, trained to lead, and she's all yours." Hope frowned a little as she ran her hands over the dog's head. "What's wrong?"

"Does this mean I'm blind for good?" Hannah froze. "Hannah, Papa and Ma won't tell me anything. What's going on? Am I blind?"

"Yeah," Hannah said gently.

"Well..." Hope said. "This...uh...this pretty much sucks."

"Well, you got out of school for a while, and you got the dog you've been bugging Papa about all summer..." Hope shrugged. "We're still here for you-"

"Hannah Grace Munch, I know they aren't going to dump me in the street because I bleed from my eyes."

"I see you've mastered Papa's sarcasm and dead-pan wit."

"It rubs off."

"And sticks to all around."

"Look, blind isn't so bad." Hope took a deep breath. "I can still listen to music."

"I can sell my bike and get one built for two, we can ride around together and you'll hardly know the difference."

"Cool." Hope tried to smile lightly, but her sister saw through it.

"Hope," Hannah muttered, hugging the girl. "You'll be okay."

"How?"

"I don't know."

"How can they still want me like this? I was already getting in trouble when I could see it coming, but now I can't and how can they want me?" Hannah hugged Hope closer.

"They love you, and they will all be here for you. I promise.And if they aren't, I'll kick 'em in the forehead personally."

John listened at the door as the girls talked. Hannah got a dog. John hadn't agreed to a dog, but he wasn't about to do anything to hurt either girl right now. A dog was perhaps the best thing in the world for Hope right now, and Hannah was first to see it. He realized the best thing he'd done for both girls was to adopt Hope. John knew that if anyone could pull Hope through this, it was Hannah.

Alex tucked herself into her husband's arms and sighed deeply. Her blue eyes looked troubled.

"Are they going to be okay, John?" John sighed.

"As long as they're together, they'll be okay." Alexandra nodded andsqueezed her husband affectionately. "Hannah gother a damn dog. Bigger than Rookie." Alex groaned. "If she hadn't, I think I probably would have."

"Service dog?"

"Probably took all the money she'd saved up from working for you and Casey."

"We'll cover it."

"Only if she lets you."

"John," Alex said, looking up at her husband. "I..."

"I know, Alex," John said, pulling her back into a hug. "I'm scared for them, too." Alex nodded. John seemed to know what she couldn't say, and exactly what she needed him to say to make things better. He kissed her forehead and stroked her hair. "Hannah isn't going to let her get too depressed, and we won't let Hannah take care of her sister alone. We'll help Hope, and Hannah, and they'll hold us up."

"You have such faith in Hannah."

"She's never disappointed me, and never could."

"Does she know that?"

"God I hope so."

* * *

Sorry its so short. Been busy, and not getting enough sleep to write, but not so little sleep that it helps me write. Oy. Anyway, there are two more, possibly three more chapters to come and I'll be done. They kind of write themselves, but it takes me time to type them out. 


	11. Chapter 11

This isn't the last chapter, but it is my longest, so enjoy!

* * *

Elliot read through the file, and handed each page off to Maureen as he finished it. She followed and passed it to her new partner, Victor Stemple, who placed it neatly in the folder as he finished. As Elliot finished, he watched his daughter and her partner argue on how to go about handling the case, remembering how many partners he'd gone through. Maureen was like her father; couldn't keep a partner longer than she'd wear a pair of socks.

"Like Daddy, like daughter. Are you going to step in, or should I get the hose?" Fin asked, eyeing the scene before them.

"Let them work it out. Liv and I would fight like that. Cap let us work it out on our own."

"And look where you ended up. Wasn't your second kid with her conceived in the cribs?" Elliot's eyes bugged.

"OKAY! Break it up. Seperate. You over there, you over here." Fin let out a thick laugh from his desk, and only stopped when a paper ball bounced from his head from Elliot's side of the room. "Maureen, you were first at the scene-"

"I was there when the whole thing happened, Stabler," Maureen said, in a dry tone that matched her father's from his younger days. "They didn't make me for a cop because I had the baby with me."

"So..."

"So...? So, what?"

"Tell me what is going to happen."

"Oh, Jesus Christ, Dad. You know what is going to happen. I'm called into court,. I give my side of the story, Casey gives me hard but easy to answer questions while Hope listens, probably crying into John and Alex's soulders, I'll probably get weepy, because I'm so much more emotional now-"

"Maureen," Elliot warned.

"And then I get put through the ringer by Langan. I've been through court enough to do this, Captain," she said. Her eyes were icey, and Elliot decided to back off.

"On that note, Langan won't touch this one."

"Really?"

"When he met with the parents, he had no idea it was Hope. When he read the file, I thought his eyes were going to pop out of his head. His exact words were, I beleive, 'Even I'm not so desparate for a client that I'll touch this with a ten foot pole. I may not be John Munch's friend, but that little girl did Not deserve this, and I won't take justice from her.' He dropped the parents as clients and walked away." Maureen grinned with satisfaction. "It was a truly beautiful sight."

"Sorry I missed it."

"Dad!" came a yell from the doorway to the squadroom.

"Elijah," Elliot said as the kid ran to him, holding a paper. Elliot lifted the seven year old up and hugged him tightly. "What's that?"

"I'm Cragen! Elijah Paul Cragen Stabler. Just like Grandpa and Casey."

"You can call her Grandma now, kid."

"He better not," Casey said. "We're due in court in 15 minutes."

"I'll see you at home, Love," Elliot said, kissing Olivia.

"Good luck."

"We got Petrovski. She doesn't so much like Casey or Maureen." Liv grinned.

"Then she won't mind that you, Maureen and Casey are as close as you are to Hope." Elliot smiled as he pulled his suit jacket on.

"That's out idea."

* * *

"Hannah?"

"What?" Hannah mumbled in her sleep.

"I need to use the bathroom," Hope said. Hannah could hear the embarassment in her voice. "Molly always takes me to the kitchen." Hannah climbed out of her bed and took Hope's arm to lead her. "Don't you need the light?"

"No," Hannah mumbled. "I know this place well enough. Found my way through the apartment in the dark enough times to get to the bathroom. You'll get used to it, Hope."

"Thanks," Hopse said as she felt her hand touch the toilet.

"I'll be outside." Hannah stepped into the hall. "You did really well today."

"I cried on the stand."

"That's a good thing. The jury'll have more sympathy for you. They'll be more likely to find the girls guilty. They're going to spend some time at Rikers."

"They're kids," Hope said, sounding a little shocked.

"Hope, they beat the hell out of you, blinded you, and you're worried that justice is too harsh?"

"They screwed up, but they shouldn't lose their whole lives. A decent portion would be fine, like 5-10, but they'll probably be killed there. Their lawyer said they didn't know fully what they were doing because they were high. Can't they be put in a drug rehab facility for a few years?"

"Hope, that...that's a good idea. They serve time, and would be helping the community as they clean up."

"I'm ready," Hope called as she flushed. Hannah opened the door and took her sister's arm and lead her back to bed. "Hi Ma," Hope said.

"I'm not Ma; she's asleep."

"No, she's standing in the hall. I told you to turn on a light," Hope said.

"Sorry," Alex said, blushing even though they couldn't see her. " I heard you two talking about the case, and I wanted to know what you thought about it."

"Then ask," Hannah said, flatly. "Hope doesn't want them in prison. She wants them in a drug rehab program. "

"I heard. Are you sure about this, Hope?"

"If you put them in prison, they'll never change and they'll just do it again when they get out. Putting them in prison is just sentencing another person to get jumped, or possibly killed." Hope pulled her blankets up to her chin as soon as she was in her bed. "Molly," she called. The dog jumped onto the bed and turned around 4 times before resing her head in the crook of Hope's knees. "Can we talk to Casey about it in the morning?"

"Sure. Goodnight, girls."

* * *

Elliot leaned back in his chair and propped his feet up on the old desk. He'd come to know it as his own over the last 6 years as his own. But before that, the desk belonged to his mentor, friend and 'Papa-in-law.' Don had taught him everythig about what a Captain needed to be. He'd even gone so far as to have a daughter in the unit. Elliot, however, was Maureen's actual dad from birth.

"Enjoying my husband's desk?"

"Yep. I'll never fill it as well as he did, but-"

"We have a plea bargin, and they've agreed. Petrovski doesn't love it, but she admires Hope for coming up with it." Elliot pulled his feet from the desk and ushered Casey to sit. She smoothed her skirt and sat, taking Elliot's coffee and stealing a sip. "Munch?" she asked, shuddering at the tar in her mouth.

"Yeah."

"I thought he was forbidden."

"Who was going to tell him 'No' about anything today."

"Point."

"So?"

"Each girl got 5 years at Bellevue's drug rehab...and a chewing out by Petrovski."

"Really?" Elliot asked, grinning.

"Hope gave them back their lives after they took so much from her. A child was so giving and so kind that she could come up with this. Hope was asked to explain why." Elliot's smile faded a little. "She said that if someone hadn't given her a chance at a life, she'd be living in hell still. She explained our whole family and how strong we were together. She also told the girls she hoped they found people at least one tenth as good as we are, and then they would know what safe means."

"Damn."

"Kinda makes me feel a little..."

"Proud, but humble."

"Humble. Just humble. We haven't earned that."

"A blind kid can see that we have, so I guess we have."

"El, go home to your wife. She needs you there more than we need you here tonight," Casey said, smiling at her friend.

* * *

Ron looked around the dining room at the people who surrounded him. The 6 candles on the cake were dripping wax, and they were _still_ singing that damn song! The nanosecond it ended, he blew as hard as he could, and the candles went out.

"Cool! I get my wish!"

"What did you wish for?"

"Can't tell you," Ron said, smiling through the gap in his teeth. He shoved the shaggy red hair from his face and handed his plate to Don. "Cake, Dad!"

"You are getting so grown up, Red," Casey said, sniffling lightly.

"Mom, its fine! I'm 6, not 60."

"Casadee," Carol Lyn said, resting her hand on her daughter's. "Six isn't too bad. Cry when he's 16."

"Molly and Rookie are playing," Eli called from the window.

"That's not playing," Liv groaned running out there. "Rookie! Go home! GO!" Rookie scrambled away through the back fence. "Molly, inside. Now." The other dog pranced inside.

"We get one of the puppies," Don said, elbowing John, who was white.

"And then its snip-snip for Rookie."

"Puppies?" Ronny squealed. "THAT'S not what I wished for, Mom!"

"What?"

"I didn't want the DOG to have babies," he whined. "I wanted you and Dad to adopt a little brother!" Casey and Don went as white as John had moments ago. Don stumbled over his words, not even forming half a sentence.

"Will a big sister work?" Liv asked, rescuing her 'father.'

"Huh?"

"Ron, I know its never been fully explained to you, but you're my little brother."

"Huh?"

"Nine years ago, your dad adopted me. I'm your big sister. You are actually Allie and Eli's uncle. Is that cool?"

"Not really."

"Oh."

"Well...can you come talk at my school and tell my class your my big sister? No one will believe me that Elijah is my nephew." Liv nodded. "Okay. Now its cool."

"I'm not calling him Uncle Ron," Allie commented, giving Olivia a look that much resembled James Wilson. "Mom? Can I have my own dog? Rookie is SO Eli's dog."

"If Molly has pups, then ask Uncle John for one."

"You may have them ALL."

* * *

Ronny's birthday party had been the true beginning of healing for the whole family. Hope was doing well with Molly, and John was getting used to a full house. He decided to take a leave of absense to spend time with Hope, and it brought the two as close as he and Hannah were. Hannah was backing off from full-time care of Hope, but only because she saw that John and Alex needed to gain the child's trust more. Hannah would be leaving in the fall for Harvard, and Hope wouldn't be joining her.

Casey and Don were seeing less of Eli, and spending more time with Ron out of the house. It was hard for Don, who missed the child terribly, but he needed to back off. He needed to let Elliot be Eli's dad. When Elijah was a year old, Olivia pulled him from daycare, and allowed Don to take care of him. It was supposed to be Allie, too, but that hadn't lasted long. He couldn't keep up with her, and she needed kids her age to play with. So for the better part of 6 months, it was just Don and Eli. After that, it was Don, Ronny and Elijah for 3 years full time, five days a week. He was like Don's own child in his heart. And to see that he was scared and hurting, it was hard on the man. But now, he could see Elliot and Elijah bonding again, playing again like they did before. He could see that the only thing keeping Eli coming over at night was Don not telling him to stay at home.

Now that he did, the boy listened, and it started to get easier on the family. Allie and Eli fought more, but its more because they were just together more. Ron missed sharing his room with Elijah, but enjoyed the time with his dad and mom more. He was starting to like being the only child. They showered him with attention now that there wasn't someone else to inturrupt and need them. Now, he was their only child. And he was starting to enjoy it. Even though Olivia was his 'big sister,' he didn't count that, because she was much older.

Elliot and Allie were spending more time together, but they were still so quiet. They'd see movies, just the two of them, go out for hot chocolate, and he took her ice skating. But they never talked. Olivia decided to stay as far out of it as she could. The two would come to an understanding eventually.

"Mom?" Allie called into the living room.

"Why are you still up, Birthday Girl?"

"I have an assignment," she said, sitting on the bar stool at the breakfast bar. She peered through the window into the kitchen. Her mother raised both eyebrows. "Its due at the end of the May, We have two whole months."

"Big assignment."

"I have to interview my whole family."

"Really?"

"My teacher said that to understand ourselves we need to know and understand where we came from." Liv nodded. "I don't know what to ask though. I mean, I know that you didn't get married until I was one."

"Maybe I can help you come up with some questions...?"

"Sure."

"Do you want to do this NYPD style?" Allie smiled and nodded. "You need name, date of birth, marital status and vital info." Allie started writing her mother's word in her note book, which had been sitting at the breakfast bar after they finished homework earlier. "Now you need a list of everyne to interview. New page." Allie flipped the paper. "Me, Eli, Maureen, Luke, Liz, Kathleen, Rose, Dickie, Lex, your dad," Liv listed off.

"Slow down," Allie said, writing the names down. Olivia paused. "Ready."

"Don and Casey, Ron, John, Alex, Hannah, Hope, and Fin."

"And James."

"Allison-"

"Mom," she said, putting a hand up. "I will not call him my dad. I have a terrific dad. But I need to meet him. For me."

"I don't think-"

"You met your real dad. Right?" Olivia nodded. "You told me once you wanted to meet him your whole life."

"Do you want to know what I found out when I did meet him?"

"What?"

"That I had a father the whole time, and he's on the other side of the fence, in his kitchen, probably doing dishes, same as me."

"I already have a dad. I'm not going to stop loving Elliot Stabler because I meet James. James will never be my dad."

"then why-"

"I DON'T LOOK LIKE YOU!" she shouted. "Eli, Maureen and Dickie looks like Dad, Lizzie and Kathleen look like Kathy, Ron looks like Casey, Hannah and Hope look like each other. I don't look like anyone! How can I tell them where I come from when I don't even know!"

"Christ," Liv said under her breath. "I thought we were through this."

"I need to meet him. See why he didn't want me," Allie said, looking down.

"You need to meet him one time and say 'I did just fine without you," Olivia offered. Allison nodded. "Allie, I hope you get that chance, but don't ruin what you have with your dad trying to reach that." Olivia walked away.

"Mom-"

"I'll have Maureen drive you out next weekend."

* * *

"Allie?" Elliot said softly as the two walked through the park. "Am I a good dad?"

"I think so."

"Then why do you want to meet him so badly? What do you think he has to offer that I can't?" he asked the girl, gently. Allie took his hand.

"You and Dickie have the same hands, and he has Kathy's nose. Maureen has your eyes and your smile and Kathy's nose and her chin. Eli is your clone."

"You look like your mom."

"Not completely. I have her chin, and the same eyebrows. But I don't see my eyes there, or my smile, or my hair. I don't hear my laugh, or see how I roll my eyes. We do a lot of things different. I need to know, Dad."

"Allison," he started, swallowing. "I need to know something. I need you to promise me you will tell me the truth, okay?"

"I promise, Dad."

"Do you love me? I know we talked in the hospital, and you told me then, but we haven't talked much then." Elliot kneeled down to look her in the eyes. "You haven't so much as hugged me in over a year, Allie, since I got out of the hospital...not unless I hugged you first. Do you even want me as your Dad still?"

"Dad, I love you," she said. "But I need to meet him. Just once. He'll never be my dad, but he's my father. I need to meet him."

"Why, honey?"

"I need to know why he didn't want me. I'm not...I'm...Dad, why doesn't he love me?" she asked in a small voice that tugged at Elliot's heart.

"He's an idiot who missed out on the best little girl I've ever met. He screwed up, and he missed the best part of life."

"Can I still ask him? Maureen is taking me tomorrow, and I won't go unless you are okay with it," she said, gently.

"Go," Elliot said gently, hugging her tightly. "Meet your father and see what it is you need to see."

"Thank you, Daddy," she whispered.

* * *

The hospital corridors made the 10-year-old girl shiver. Her brown hair was tied back in a straight pony tail down ther back, and her black boots were scuffing the floors. She pulled her hunter green flannel shirt tighter around her as she walked looking for His name on each door. The girl's oldest sister was waiting in the car in the lot somewhere, where the child knew she could go if she needed to. However, she was meeting someone today that she'd never known.

His name was on the door in the Oncology department. Allison Stabler took a seat outside and waiting for someone to walk through...anyone to walk through. She didn't know how she'd recognise him, just that she would.

"Can I help you?"

"I'm waiting for Dr. Wilson." The man sat next to the child.

"Oh? Do you have a consult with him?"

"Kind of. I need to meet with him." Allie met with the eyes of the man next to him. "Are you James Wilson?"

"No, but I know him. I'm Robert Chase."

"I'm Allie."

"Hello, Allie." Chase shook her hand and knocked on the door. "Jimmy, a young lady is here to see you," Chase said, with a little amusement in his voice.

"Hi," Wilson said, not knowing the child. "Do I have a consult with you and your parents today?"

"Kind of. You have a consult with me and my...father..." she said, finally able to utter the word. Chase shut the door, leaving the two to speak. "So..."she said after a moment of silence.

"What's your name?"

"Maureen," she lied. "Maureen Ryan."

"Well, Maureen, what seems to be the trouble?"

"I...uh..."

"Are you sick?"

"No, I'm looking for someone." James shifted in his seat and studied the girl's face.

"Is your name really Maureen?" Allie stared him in the eye. "No, I didn't think so."

"How would-"

"You have your mother's chin, and you have my eyes, that's how I know." Allison stood to leave. "Allie, wait." The child turned to face him at the door. "You obviously wanted to talk to me. Please, don't walk away. Sit, talk," he urged. She staired up at him for a moment before sitting. "Would you like something to drink?"

"Coffee."

"You are your mother's child."

"My mom drinks tea. Dad and Maureen drink coffee."

"When did Olivia switch to tea?"

"I don't know. So..."

"Well, I'm your dad, I guess."

"No, you're my father. Elliot Stabler is my dad," she said softly.

"Right." James stood and lead the girl down the hall toward the cafeteria. They walked in silence as they got trays of food, and Allie sugared and creamed her coffee. As they sat, James found the child studying his face.

"You okay?"

"Why didn't you want me?" James wasn't surprised she'd taken on her mother's strong personality.

"I was scared. When I met you, you were 4 months old, and your mother had Elliot, and I wasn't going to take away the only dad you knew. Next time I saw you, you were a year and a half old, and calling him Daddy." James sat back and rubbed his forehead. "You didn't know me, want me, or even care about me. I didn't want to hurt you, Allie."

"And yet, you still some how managed to."

"How?"

"You didn't even try to know me."

"Where are you parents?"

"New York."

"NEW YORK!? How-"

"My sister drove me. She's, like, 30, and a cop. I think I'm safe." James nodded and sighed.

"You are so much like your mother; stubborn and quick with the come-backs." Allie wandered back with her empty cup and poured more coffee.

"Tell me about it. Eli hates it," she said, refilling the cup with cream and sugar.

"Eli?"

"He's 8. Little bother."

"You mean little _brother?"_

"Nope."

"Okay." There was a long silence. "I have an 8-year-old son, Alex Chase." Allie's eyes shot up.

"You abandened one kid to go out and have another? You're screwed up."

"He's not my biological son, he was adopted by my...boyfriend." He waited for some response from the kid.

"And...?"

"And we're raising him together. You met Dr. Chase...he's my...um..."

"Your boyfriend? Husband? You're raising a kid together, better be a serious relationship."

"Are you okay with...me...being?"

"Look, James, my sister Kathleen is 'married' to a woman named Rose, raising a boy named Lex...also short for Alexander. Popular name. Anyway, if you think I'm a homophobe, than you don't know my parents at all."

"You have a mouth on you."

"Only when I'm pissed." She snatched a grape from his plate and popped it in her mouth.

"Are you sure your mother said James Wilson and not Greg House?" She looked at him. "Nevermind."

"Ah, Wilson," came a familier voice. "I see your spawn found you at last."

"What, can all of you see this but me?"

"Probably." House snatched the last grape from Wilson's tray. "Don't worry, kid. You come from a smart, Jewish doctor."

"And live with two cops. I could take both of you." Greg chuckled.

"Probably," Wilson admitted. "Listen, Allie," he started.

"Allie?" Maureen called, stepping into the cafeteria. "We need to go if you want to get home before Mom and Dad have a heart attack."

"Yeah, okay."

"It was good to meet you, Allie."

"You, too."

"Can I visit?"

"Ask my mom and dad. They'll probably say yes."

"Keep in touch, kid." Allie waved at the man before heading out the door with her sister.

"Who was that?" Chase asked, bringing his tray to the table.

"My daughter."

* * *

"You look like him."

"Yeah."

"You okay?"

"I look like my father."

* * *

One more chapter to go, and we'll be done, folks! Sorry about posting something almost direct from my 'cross-over' House story. But its s'posed to go together! 


	12. Chapter 12

Well folks, last chapter! I hope you enjoy reading as much as I enjoyed writing! Its been great! I'm a little sad that its over. It was such fun writing this for my friends! Special thanks to One Tree Fan, who is my guiding light, my friend, and occasionally, my muse. Thank you, Rach! Thank you so much from the bottom of my heart! This chapter is for you!!

* * *

Elliot chewed his thumb nail behind his desk, waiting for word from Maureen that they were back in New York. The two had left at around 9:00 that morning to make the hour and a half drive, and should be back soon. He spit the broken nail off into the trash can and tried to keep his mind on the case he was supposed to be working. 

A bark from the far end of his squad room tore his attention from his work once more.

"Molly, down," Hope said, sternly. The dog continued to growl at the man, towering over Hope.

"Call you're mutt off," the man snarled.

"Molly is just protective," Hope said. "If you hadn't tried to scare her, she wouldn't have snapped at you."

"Is that my daughter I hear?"

"Hey Papa. Ma's on her way up, but stopped in the hall to talk to Maureen." Elliot pounced from his office.

"Is Allie with them?"

"Yeah, she's really quiet though. Ready for dinner, Papa? Hannah's holding the cab."

"See you later," John said, pulling his coat on.

"Hear you later," Hope joked. The two set off, lead by the dog, who growled one more time as she passed the man who was being pulled by Fin to a holding cell.

"Maur?" Elliot called, heading into the hall. "Hi, Allie," he said, smiling warmly at his daughter.

"Hi Dad."

"How'd it go?"

"James is a dick," Maureen told her father.

"Honey, what happen?" Elliot asked kneeling to his daughter.

"Nothing. He wants to visit." Elliot stiffened. "I don't know if I want him to, though. He has a kid that he can spend as much time with as he wants, and I don't know If I want him or my little brother around."

"You have a little brother?"

"Alexander Chase. He's 8. James and his boyfriend are raising him."

"Allie," Elliot said, leading her into his office. "Do you not want him around because he's gay?"

"Oh, please, Dad. If that was all, do you think the phone bill would be so high calling Seattle?"

"No," he admitted. "As much as I dislike the man, I still wonder why you don't want him around."

"I was hoping that he wouldn't look like me. I was hoping he would look so different that you and mom made a mistake and I was all your daughter, not his." Elliot smoothed her hair. "I was scared that I would hate him more than I did before."

"I think I understand now why you needed to meet him."

"Maureen is right. He is a dick."

"Allison," Elliot warned.

"He left me, not knowing how good of a dad you would be just to go off and raise another kid? I think the language is warrented."

"Jesus, you sound like your mother." Allie smiled and blushed lightly. "If you want to get to know him, let him come visit you, I would be okay with it."

"No."

"Why?"

"Because," she said. "Because I was so scared that he would hate me, and that I would hate him. I spent the last year convincing myself that it was good to hate him. He left me."

"But now?"

"Now I'm scared that I'll like him."

* * *

Olivia wiped the last of the dinner dishes dry and placed them in the cabinet. She smiled at the clean kitchen, mentally noting that as a child, her mother never cleaned. Her children had a healthier dinner, and a cleaner home than her own mother had provided for her. 

"Looks nice, Babe," Elliot said, wrapping his arms around her from behind.

"Thanks." Olivia turned in his arms and planet a kiss on his cheek. "All the chipmonks asleep?"

"Elijah and Ronny are still chattering in there, but they'll be out soon enough."

"Mmm, not soon enough for me," Olivia teased, pinching Elliot's backside.

"You're like a teenager," Elliot teased back. "We start _any_thing, Little Cragen'll be up and asking questions in 3 second's flat."

"He is his father's child."

"MOM?" Allie yelled from her room. Liv groaned and pulled herself away from her husband's arms. She padded down the hall and stopped at her daughter's door.

"Yes, Allison, who should be asleep an hour ago?"

"Can I ask you a question?" Liv nodded and sat on her daughter's bed. "Dad said it would be okay if James visited. Are you okay with it." Olivia's heart thudded hard in her chest with fury.

"If you want him to, then you can visit with him."

"That's not what I asked. I asked if you were okay with it."

"Its not my descision."

"You're avoiding the question. Is it because you don't know, or you don't want to answer?" Olivia bit her lip. "If you and Dad honestly do not want James here, I don't have to visit with him. He's a dick."

"Allison!"

"Mother, he gave up his only daughter to go out and adopt a son." Olivia closed her eyes a moment, feeling the sting in her heart that her daughter must have felt. "He didn't know Dad, or how much Dad loves me, or you and Eli. He knew he didn't want me. Why should I give him a chance now?"

"Because," Olivia started. "If you don't, you might regret it later."

"Did you love him?"

"I did once."

"What happened?"

"He didn't want to settle down and have a family, so we went our separate ways."

"Maybe...maybe one visit, and then I won't talk to him ever again."

"One visit, but don't close yourself off to the possibility of another." Allie nodded.

* * *

Elijah looked from Don to Casey. They were mad. Both of them. They were both in Don's office, and Elijah was in The Chair. Everyone hated the chair. Everyone who sat in that chair got a chewing out so bad they cried, even his parents. 

"Elijah," Don said, sternly.

"I swear, I won't do it again!"

"You promised before."

"I'm sorry!"

"I called your parents and let them know where you are."

"They were fighting with Allie again, and I just didn't want to hear it anymore."

"When you come over, Elijah Paul Cragen Stabler, you knock," Casey told the child, pulling her robe tight. "Don and I were...sleeping."

"No you weren't-"

"Elijah," Don warned. "When Casey and I are in our room, you stay out unless you are invited in. Do you understand?" Eli nodded. "Now, why were they going at it?"

"Allie's father wants to visit."

"Not this again," Casey muttered.

"She doesn't want to see him, but Mom thinks she needs to."

"Eli, do you fully understand what's going on?"

"Jimmy was basically a sperm donor." Don choked on his Red Vine. "That's what Dad told Mom. Now that Allie met him, he wants to visit, but she said he's a dick." Don rubbed his forehead. "Grandpa, are you still mad at me?"

"Yes."

"I'm sorry."

"Sorry doesn't fix this. You broke my trust, Eli."

"How do I fix it?"

"You keep your word."

"Dad said a man is only as good as his word."

"That means you do what you say you will. If you tell your mom you will clean your room, you clean it. You told me you would stop sneaking over. And here you are, middle of the night, in our house." Eli sniffled.

"I'm sorry, Grandpa."

"Elijah," Elliot called from the back door. "Don, can I come in?"

"Office!" Don called back. Soon, Elliot was in the door.

"Keep your word, Stabler. Got it?" Eli nodded. "Go back to bed."

"Sorry, Don," Elliot said, taking his son by the hand. The two left the house and walked across the yards.

"I'm sorry, Dad," Eli said, in a small voice.

"I know, son. I am, too."

"For what?"

"I'm sorry I left you, and that I broke your trust in me so much that you need to sleep over there," Elliot said, opening the sliding glass door to the dining room of his home. "I'm sorry that I hurt you, Eli."

"Dad..."

"Can you forgive me?" Eli nodded and hugged his father. "Now, no more sneaking in on Don and Casey?"

"I promise."

"Good. Go get back into bed." Eli nodded and headed off to his room.

* * *

"I still don't see why you had to come along." 

"If someone needed to I.D. the body after Benson and Stabler get done with you, I'd be right there."

"Then why did you bring Liv?"

"To meet the woman she is named after." Greg snatched his friend's soda and slurped down the last bit as James Wilson drove through the neighborhood, looking for the house number that Olivia had given him over the phone. "Liver, wakey wakey."

"Give it a rest Dad," Liv Stabler said from the back seat. "Not sleeping, iPod turned up."

"She gets that from you," James told his friend.

"Sarcasm? From me? Why would you think such a thing?" James rolled his eyes and pulled up to the house.

"Here goes nothing," James said, taking a deep breath. He grabbed his photo album and stepped out of the car. Just as he raised his hand to knock, the door opened.

"Who the hell are you?" the boy said.

"ELIJAH PAUL CRAGEN STABLER!" Olivia called.

"Uh-oh." James smirked.

"First, you don't answer the door," Olivia said, as she walked to the door. "Second, watch the language. I don't care if Grandpa, dad, Maureen, or I say it; you may not."

"Hello, Olivia." The woman froze. "I know, I'm early. There was less traffic than I expected."

"That's a first. Come on in."

"Thanks." James stepped in. Just as the door was closing, a cane slapped it open.

"Forgetting someone?"

"He wouldn't take No for an answer. I'm sorry."

"He house trained?" Elliot joked from the couch, where he sat holding Jo Anna, Maureen's little daughter.Olivia shot him a look. He shrugged in response and went back to entertaining Jo Anna.

"Allie," Olivia called into the yard. "Jimmy's here."

"Jimmy?" Elliot asked softly to no one.

"Stabler," Olivia warned once. "Why don't you and Eli go play soccer."

"Who is he, Dad?" Elijah asked.

"I'm James Wilson."

"Are you Allie's sperm donor?" Olivia went white, while Greg and Liv worked on holding in laughter.

"Basically, yes."

"Go play with Ron," Allie ordered the boy. Elijah made a face at his sister before dashing through the glass door.

"This is why some creatures eat their young," Greg teased.

"House," James warned. "Don't make me hurt you."

"Nice, my father is a violent man."

"Allie-"

"Jimmy-"

"HEY!" Elliot yelled as the argument began. "Honey, why don't you take Dr. House and his daughter outside and she can play with Eli and Ronny while I start dinner?" Olivia nodded, and lead the limping man outside with the 12-year-old girl in tow. Elliot nodded at Allie and brought Jo Anna into the kitchen with him, leaving the two alone.

"So..."James started, sitting on the couch. "Nice digs you got here."

"Its home."

"Do you want to show me your room?"

"What the hell are you, a pedophile?"

"What? No! I was just-"

"Would you relax?" James took a deep breath. "My room is a mess." She lead him down the hall and opened the door.

"Mess? What mess?"

"The bed spead is rumpled, the pillows are off-center, and the rug needs to be vaccuumed."

"Looks cleaner than your little brother's."

"Jimmy, let's get one thing straight. I don't like you. I don't know you, and I don't know if I want to. You left me. You didn't even come when I was born. How the hell am I supposed to feel about you?" James sat on the corner of the bed.

"I screwed up."

"No shit, Sherlock."

"But maybe we can start over?"

"Why?" James sighed. "Why would I want to start over with a man who never wanted me? I have a dad, and he's the best. Why would I want to throw it away again for a man who may or may not stick around?" James opened his mouth to say something, but clamped it shut when words failed him. "Don't make the mistake of screwing with me."

"Wouldn't dream of it."

"Dad doesn't like people hanging out in our bedrooms." Allison lead the man from her room back to the living room.

"I, uh, I brought some pictures for you."

"Of what?"

"Me as a kid. My friends and family now." James opened the photo album that had been dropped onto the couch.

"Who's that?"

"That's my mom and dad." Allie nodded. James flipped the page. "That is me, Robbie, Greg, Allison, Alexander, and these are Greg's kids; Liv, Elliot, Jeff, Dylan and Doug. Jeff and Doug are twins."

"They have kids named Elliot and Liv?"

"Liv's birth mother knew your parents, and actually, introduced me to your mom. She named Liv after your mom, and I think Liv picked out her brother's name."

"Am I named after Allison?"

"I think so, yes. She met your mom a few times, and they really hit it off." Allie flipped through the pages.

"Who is this?"

"That is me when I was your age."

"I'm wearing the same shirt," Allie pointed out. Lo and behold, her baseball t shirt was very similar to the one James wore as a boy. "Its always been my favorite."

"That one was my favorite as a boy." Allie shit the album. "Allison-"

"I don't want to like you."

"You don't have to."

"You're nice, and you're kind of cool," Allie growled at the man.

"Thanks?" he said, in more of a question.

"Its easier to hate you."

"Why?"

"I have a dad, and I don't want to lose him again." Elliot stepped in from the kitchen.

"Allie," he called. His daughter ran to him, hugging him tightly. "Honey, look at me." Her eyes lisfted to meet her dad's. "Its okay to like him. It doesn't mean you love me less, or that I love you less. Okay?"

"You won't cut you wrists again?"

"Never again, sweet heart. And you had _nothing_ to do with that, Allison Paige. Nothing. It was the stupidest thing I have ever done."

"Totally."

"And you and Mom forgave me. Even Elijah did."

"Yeah..."

"The stupidest thing James ever did was walk away from you. Can you forgive him?"

"Guess I could try..."

"Why don't you two go take a walk? Show him the neighborhood...tell him about yourself."

"Okay," she said, pulling her hat from her belt loop on her pants. She refastened the sizing strap and pulled it on. "Wanna go for a walk?"

"That would be nice."

* * *

Thanksgiving was Olivia Stabler's favorite time of year. The house was full, Maureen and Lizzie would help cook, Kathleen and Rose flew in with Lex, and everyone was relaxed and happy. She looked around the table. Don sat at the head of the table next to Casey. The two had been doing so well the last few months. Ron was seven, and starting to show real potential in piano, and was just a fun, easy-going red-head. He and Eli, who was 8 and a half, were never far from each other. They were best friends, and even their dogs, Rookie and Sarge, were close. Allison would be 11 in a few months, and was finally back to normal. She and Elliot were closer than ever, joking, nick names, and never leaving the house without a hug. Much to Olivia's surprise, Jimmy was the one who repaired the relationship the most. He would spend every other weekend with Elliot and Allie, camping, hiking, or just playing video games. Allie and James were close, but Elliot was, and always will be her dad. 

Kathleen and Rose were happy in Seattle. They were both working for Microsoft, in a nice house, and more in-love every day. Lex was a very smart shild, and in Liv's opinion, well adjusted.

John and Alex, too, weemed more in-love with each other than ever before. Hope was showing such progress, and was completely turned around from being blinded. She sometimes could see so much more than the world, at least in Liv's opinion. And Hannah! She was doing so well in law school. She had her sights set on Alex's job. With her grades, it wasn't going to be difficult.

Still, Olivia couldn't take her eyes off her daughter and two dads. Allie sat at the dinner table between the two. Joking back and forth with the two of them. Her daughter was finally at peace with her exsistance.

"Hey Liv?" Don called, getting attention.

"Hmm?"

"What are you thankful for?"

"Same thing as I am every day."

"What's that?"

"I finally know where I belong."

* * *

Thank you for reading! I'm going to focus my time now on The Transfer, and hopefully write another good one!Wish me luck, all! Bye for now!

Megan Faye

3-20-2006


End file.
